I'm Ready To Move Forward...

[DaisySH]

It is assistive though it does contain a smattering of Christian stuff... just so's ya know. But s...

its ok, at this point... I need all the help I can get.. maybe the almighty needs to intervene... :)

 

[DaisySH]

I keep hoping every time I open my eyes every morning things will be different... I will feel different...My wasted emotions would have somehow dissipated and I would be ready to start anew... I have days where I am optimistic and feel hope... Those days have been far and few between lately.. My brain refuses to stop overthinking... My heart is scattered in the wind and the rest of my body is starting to give out...There is no joy in the world.. I try my best to see the beauty and miracle that life is but cannot help but feel cheated and as an outsider.. I live in a dark cloud that engulfs my soul.. It's rain is filled with disdain and uncertainty.. I wish I could fast forward... I wish I could.... I wish I could so many things... I wish... I wish to feel like a "normal" human being.. I wish the love I feel could be reciprocated... I wish... These are things I have no control over and it makes me feel like a failure... Almost 32 years on this earth and what has been my contribution? what is the meaning of my life? What is the point? There is no point... It has no value, no contribution, no purpose... It is a worthless, undesirable, ugly, pathetic box that holds nothing but suffering. How can I get it to stop??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

 

[stillstanding2]

I keep hoping every time I open my eyes every morning things will be different... I will feel different....

Daisy, when I hit the like button, it doesn't always like the content. I means I'm listening. I keep hearing some of my own thoughts in your words. I wish you well. You are so young now. I don't mean that condescendingly. Youth is on your side. Take care dear. You will feel better. It helps me to write in an assortment of journals and here on the forum. There is always someone listening.

 

[Deleted member 32655]

So I've been carrying a lot of weight for the past I want to say 10 years...I have not spoken about this...

Hi, can I just praise you for escaping your first guy. Well done. So many people don't get to leave & die. You were brave, are brave. You are so brave & courageous that you know you can survive whatever life throws at you. You're fab. Be honest and true to yourself & know that time does heal. Take super care

 

[DaisySH]

Thank you, I needed that... It is so hard to believe that I am strong sometimes... At times I don't even know who I am but I am working on it!

 

[DaisySH]

I must admit.. I was having a shitty day.. & then I came online and forgot about my problems for a while... That is why I am so thankful I found this site!

 

[stillstanding2]

I must admit.. I was having a shitty day.. & then I came online and forgot about my problems for a while...

Lotsa folks here with lotsa obstacles, and you are welcome among all of us. You don't have to look far for people who have faced the same situations and worked through them. You are young, smart and resilient. You may not have caused the problems with your ex, but you can fix them. Take your time, and write when you want to. There is always someone here.

 

[DaisySH]

Lotsa folks here with lotsa obstacles, and you are welcome among all of us. You don't have to lo...

thank you! :)

 

[DaisySH]

“Others imply that they know what it is like to be depressed because they have gone through a divorce, lost a job, or broken up with someone. But these experiences carry with them feelings. Depression, instead, is flat, hollow, and unendurable. It is also tiresome. People cannot abide being around you when you are depressed. They might think that they ought to, and they might even try, but you know and they know that you are tedious beyond belief: you are irritable and paranoid and humorless and lifeless and critical and demanding and no reassurance is ever enough. You’re frightened, and you’re frightening, and you’re “not at all like yourself but will be soon,” but you know you won’t.” – Kay Redfield Jamison, An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir Of Moods And Madness

 

[stillstanding2]

“Others imply that they know what it is like to be depressed because they have gone through a divorce,...

I marked that I "like" this only to say I read it.

I and many, many others on the forum know what you mean with this quote. May I say that hopelessness can evolve into better things as time passes. You have made a major change for yourself. Yet you have yet to feel it's benefits. The benefit will come. Keep talking with us (I hope) because we know much about depression, and can be company when you want it.

 

[DaisySH]

I marked that I "like" this only to say I read it.

I and many, many others on the forum know w...

I do, and it helps.. In my worst moments I come here and look for support... I really do try...You are right, I've yet to feel like anything makes sense... hopefully one day it will...

 

[stillstanding2]

I do, and it helps.. In my worst moments I come here and look for support... I really do try...You are r...

Here's a thought: You've taken the leap out of a terrible situation into a place that is unfamiliar. You are off-balance, but can soon get your bearings and reflect that you are a survivor of a genuine catastrophe. Your awareness has to catch up with your instinct and courage.

Is that useful?