Hi there,
I've been married for several years and he was a service member, twice deployed, thats was recently medically retired. He never dealt with his PTSD before and he got severely depressed after his issues that made him get discharged. He shut me out, started to drink heavily and sometimes did drugs. He would go away for days at time leaving me and our kids at home alone.
Things got bad when he started to explode in anger and broke a lot of furniture. He would break things and right after that he became verbally abusive.
After months of trying to understand and be there for him, I gave him an ultimatum that he needed to go seek help. He started doing some group therapy and was put on a bunch of meds(Zoloft was one of them) He was very inconsistent with his meds and would take them for days and then stop cold turkey, having serious withdraws symptoms. Things obviously did not improve and they got even worse. This anger outburst were more frequent, when he would break things in the house, break all electronic devices, leave us without tv or internet or punch holes in the walls; I had to call the police several times just to have him gone to a family members house so we could have a somewhat decent night at home. His drug use got worse and the humiliation and verbal abuse got to a point where I just couldn't function anymore. He became paranoid and started accusing me of cheating on him numerous of times. At first I would share my location, video chat with him while away, give him my department at work so he could call the landline, but he still thought I was lying and I was with someone.
At some point, I simply couldn't take this treatment anymore and I was afraid for what my kids will retain from this, so I left.
He's been sending voicemails, text messages and emails that go from threatening to leave me without any support for our kids, to burning the rest of my things; from crying and begging me to go back that he is going to seek treatment, that he is doing drugs again and needs me, to finally, a more calm and decent person I can actually have a conversation with.
I am feeling helpless and sometimes I feel that I abandoned him, but I know my decision was the right one for my kids at the time. I just feel like they lost their father and my husband is gone forever.
I've been married for several years and he was a service member, twice deployed, thats was recently medically retired. He never dealt with his PTSD before and he got severely depressed after his issues that made him get discharged. He shut me out, started to drink heavily and sometimes did drugs. He would go away for days at time leaving me and our kids at home alone.
Things got bad when he started to explode in anger and broke a lot of furniture. He would break things and right after that he became verbally abusive.
After months of trying to understand and be there for him, I gave him an ultimatum that he needed to go seek help. He started doing some group therapy and was put on a bunch of meds(Zoloft was one of them) He was very inconsistent with his meds and would take them for days and then stop cold turkey, having serious withdraws symptoms. Things obviously did not improve and they got even worse. This anger outburst were more frequent, when he would break things in the house, break all electronic devices, leave us without tv or internet or punch holes in the walls; I had to call the police several times just to have him gone to a family members house so we could have a somewhat decent night at home. His drug use got worse and the humiliation and verbal abuse got to a point where I just couldn't function anymore. He became paranoid and started accusing me of cheating on him numerous of times. At first I would share my location, video chat with him while away, give him my department at work so he could call the landline, but he still thought I was lying and I was with someone.
At some point, I simply couldn't take this treatment anymore and I was afraid for what my kids will retain from this, so I left.
He's been sending voicemails, text messages and emails that go from threatening to leave me without any support for our kids, to burning the rest of my things; from crying and begging me to go back that he is going to seek treatment, that he is doing drugs again and needs me, to finally, a more calm and decent person I can actually have a conversation with.
I am feeling helpless and sometimes I feel that I abandoned him, but I know my decision was the right one for my kids at the time. I just feel like they lost their father and my husband is gone forever.
