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Insert Swearish Rant Here

F F F F F. I fat this so many times a day now. I feel so screwed. I just get myself together mostly and your F ing Sh*t comes up. F U for making my mother right. Making me more your daughter with what I feel as your rage, your unbalanced mind is part of mine now. You mind f*cked us all and ill be damned if I f*cking let you indirectly f*ck with my family like you did with ours.

You were a psycho all of your F*cked up actions. What had to be a combo of depression and the rest of what my F*cking current symptoms are now making you drive us all home that day and say you were gong to kill us all. How f*cking desperate and in pain were you to do that sh*t to your family? Unfortunately I can f*cking understand that's what it was because the sh*tty turmoil is now f*cking inside me.

F*CK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL THIS SH*T. I don't want this. I don't want your F*cked up personal issues to be my own. I don't want to hear I f*cking need meds to control my hypomania. Its like a f*cking curse you're in my mind and my blood and f*ck you for even having me because I'm in f*cking hell while still f*cking alive.

What sucks is that when I confronted you about it when I was 18 and wanted my childhood bank account back for college after not seeing you for years all you said is those were isolated incidents. F*ck YOU those made me fear you more than love you. Those drove me to try to find a way to end you. Because who knows when my mother would have left. Crazy part is that she was physically abusing me while you lost your sh*t. And I saw her as the lesser threat.

Neither of you were perfect. And even after you were gone the beatings continued. Changing over to a step father who hit me so hard that yardsticks broke on me and took me with him to get another. Years of that after your psycho a*s was told my brother and I didn't want to see you ever again. Would you have said those were his isolated incidents?

Abuse is abuse you motherf*cker. I'd give all of this rant to you if I saw you again. But I don't even want your F*cked up as* near my husband and children. And its enough that I have your wild sh*t being out there in me near them. You pr*ck I'm going to fight your a*s again and do what neither of you honestly had the balls to do. I'm getting help. I'm getting a new med and diagnosis and I'm scared out of my mind and have to do this because becoming you is the alternative I see. You can't f*cking have me!

Hope you are not enjoying your life without me. You don't deserve it dad. I hope it crushes you somewhere that I'm not there. But knowing you it won't really matter.
 
I DESPISE people who have animals and do NOT TAKE CARE OF THEM. The horse that I love is so sick!!! Will my damned knowitall f*cking nephew listen to me... NO!

It's a horse. He is not of his damned cattle that make him money. So if it 'costs' money it can wait. I am so f*cking upset I am crying. And in a rage that he will not listen to me about Boy... I just him a huge f*ck YOU message.

If I had the money I would take care of Boy myself. This just makes me sick at heart. When animals depend on people and people are selfish and not responsible, it makes me want to do to them what is being done to the animal.... I hate people who do not take care of animals.. It is the worst kind of abuse as they have NO voice!
 
I'm f*cking tired! Tired I tell you. Don't give me more things to do. I have a f*cking million doctor's appointments and they stress me out! Don't f*cking ask me to drive 200 miles to pick up a cockerel who acts like a cockerel, who I told you was going to act like that (mate) and now he's a horror. A cockerel running around the yard is NOT aggressive. One who spurs you is aggressive. Put a f*cking ad in the paper - free rooster. Jeez, it's just so much easier if I do it because I know all about ads. f*ck that! Get rid of the other f*cking cock too, since he will become aggressive (mate) too when the dominant cock is gone. I told you he would over mate the hens. But I only know everything about chickens (not my words) when you agree with me. I want to get rid of all the junk in my house and listen to The Lord of the Rings trilogy. The end.
 
I'm sick and tired of ignorant people telling me that if I went out more, or did this or that, my "problems" would magically disappear. My hateful aunt told me yesterday that I should foster some kids because that would keep me so busy that I would get better. The freaking psycho! Imagine those poor kids living with me! I would scar them for life...
 
I want to f*cking scream! Tonight I've been diagnosed with bipolar as well. F*CCCCCCCCKKKKKK! I DONT WANT TO END UP GOING TO THE ER IF I GET OUT OF CONTROLL. I just want to f*cking get drunk. But I cant. My husbands at so what really is going to change from now. Are you getting it that I might at some point have to be hospitalized. Can you do that if I need it? If I tell him please don't do it will be still bring me? I've done it with vodka and he still got it for me.
I can't seem to drop that part of tonight's appointment.
 
I mighta has a wee bit of a rant.

Bout fricking zombies, even. Or: ya f*ckfaces, stay in the past. Even there? You're too much.

And waste of ammo. Still.
Half of the bloody reason I had to argue first with my therapist, second with dears, about Not Calling f*cking Doctors, as that f*ckery stresses me out far more than patching myself up on no painkillers and no booze.

And the other bloody half gets even better.
 
As keep to words = keep off actions.

One, today & home messes, I was so patient with you only because we switched... and that mate polite *talks* to imbeciles even under fire.

Two, ms.T I wasn't angry about the broken bottle. But between Waiting, whole last month, and those two imbeciles, yeah, that bottle didn't amuse me.

Three, the actual subject of this rant, pinche f*cking putas. I had a variant of this rant IDFK how many times in the last 24.

Four, half hilarious... at least both those buddies have as morbid sense of humor as I do. Becausr yes. Drag me off central Africa my mind been at idfk how long dark. We no go there... there wus market arguments and stolen and thrown fruits and other Thieves. So big deal. :facepalm: hilarity.
 

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