Relationship Insight

[Sighs]

My vet and I were talking about our relationship and he said "you have to realise that some of the connective tissue is missing. It's like having a back injury - you can still walk but your gait is all wrong"

Just wanted to share that sufferer's insight for all the other supporters wondering why their loved one behaves the way they do.

 

[Purplemunchkin]

Thanks for sharing this, it is a really good analogy.

It is true, and I know there are loads of things out there to try and illustrate it, but physical injuries and some illnesses are easier to accommodate/explain as the symptoms and restrictions tend to be a lot more obvious.

But I think one of the trickiest things is that with a physical injury, generally, if it changes it is in a predictable way. Whereas with PTSD you don't necessarily know what will cause symptoms/reactions, or what they will be.

I know unexpected fireworks can cause hubby to melt down, but don't always. So if I hear them I'm on edge expecting him to react, but I'm trying not to show that in case he's fine and my reaction causes a problem instead - IYSWIM.

 

[AnnaLost]

some of the connective tissue is missing.

Yes. That is exactly how it feels for me. I know I *did* feel affinity, love, affection once. Almost like that part of me was scraped out and I was left with a vast hollowness, an echo chamber of sorts. I remember the echoes of those feelings, but they don't relate to me now.

 

[Pretty Hurts]

thank you for sharing....this is helpful.

 

[Friday]

LMAO. Gimping along! Yep.

 

[Wastinglight]

Yes, this is helpful to me too. In my post-breakup state, I am now predictably engaged in pondering the eternal question: why? Why did he feel he couldn't he meet my needs?

 

[Sweetpea76]

Makes sense... It's probably like my vet with his physical disabilities too. He still WANTS to walk and run like he used to, but he can't. The desire is there, but the flesh just isn't.