Is My T Impatient? And What To Do...?

[Figuring Out]

Although I have always been very forthcoming to discuss my traumas (sometimes almost too forthcoming and too quick) I am slow to let go of my 'hang-ups'. I have a lot of hang-ups that I know are imature and I hold on to them. I intend to let go of them, but slower. My T tbh, I think is impatient. He pushed me really far into one of them in this weeks session and I just found the experience very very difficult. I stopped being able to speak, I regressed to an almost infantile state, I felt humiliated, my inner child was telling me to leave therapy and never come back. I was saying during the session, I'm not ready, I want to change this but I'm not ready yet. To which his response was that I've been discussing it for almost a year and he is just doing his job. To be completely honest, he almost apologized at the end of the session. I have mixed feelings. I dunno....

I am unsure what to do...I..don't know. I guess I want to change, but I find it hard to let go of my hang ups about people in my life, family, friends, co workers etc

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Can you share what the nature of these hang ups is?

On one hand, I think its good for us to be pushed beyond our comfort zones. On the other hand, sometimes things simply cannot change until our minds tell us "hey, its time to move forward!" I know I've had quite a few experiences like that, where I couldn't change for whatever reason, but then at some point something in my mind just flipped like a switch and changing was actually a lot easier than I expected it to be. (I hope this makes sense!)

 

[Figuring out]

i hold a lot of grudges basically,