I've Become A Real Asshole In Online Gaming.

[Barberian]

For the most part of my life, I've always been a peacemaker. I've always tried to be "the nice guy" except when my job required otherwise. PTSD not included.

Lately I've become a real asshole online. A month or more ago I got tired of playing WoW, and to amuse myself I'd sit in trade chat (main chat in the game) and made fun of people. Then I had a meltdown and quit the game.

Almost a month ago I started playing World of Tanks. At first I tried being a nice guy... that didn't last too long. I slowly got meaner and meaner. Then last week I told my clan to f*ck off and I quit the clan. Now I'm just an asshole all around on the game when I'm in the mood.

I'm also not as stressed because trying to talk with people, strangers and be nice and play the game was actually a lot more stress than I thought. When I quit the clan I was actually happier knowing I wasn't going to be stressed talking and playing "nice" with my clan mates.

Being mean goes against my old nature and is kind of a surprise for me. I'm actually quite enjoying it. If someone pisses me off I say exactly what's on my mind, and then I'm like a cat with a mouse until the match is over. I just don't care anymore. My T said I'm almost a martyr in the amount of bullshit I put up with. Well, not anymore. This is what I was afraid of if I let the genie out of the bottle.

 

[Friday]

Griefer!

My son says briefing is good for the soul. So you can save your self control for real people.

 

[dutchiedelta]

You can't be nice all the time. There is a balance.
Maybe you've some catching up to do with being a pain in the rear.
Lashing out can be empowering.
Not what you want forever but being nicenice was costing you apparently.
Doesn't sound like you've gone all sociopath. Just being human with added PTSD.

 

[jackrabbit]

The only thing I'd say, as a fellow gamer, is to try and direct it at assholes who deserve it.

You can get a lot of mileage out of abusing abusers. It's both good for the game and good for the soul.

:)

 

[combatgoldfish]

Noob. :D

 

[Friday]

It won't play on my tablet, but I'm pretty sure this is the song I'm thinking of

 

[Kaishi]

Well, some gamers *need* to be told to f*ck off, because they're just bully losers with no life and compensating for their mess.

You've done something real in the world, and you're doing a service to the noobs that better get real as well, now. Don't feel too bad about yourself.

 

[dutchiedelta]

With all due respect, even bully losers who have no life are human beings.
We got PTSD. Others were not in combat but may have their own share of bad starts.

I understand Barberian for sometimes twisting the knife a bit.
That's often part and parcel of our scarring.
Found myself doing the same once or twice.

But somewhere on the other end of the line, there's a person who has their own hangups.

 

[Kaishi]

Yeah - not disputing that at all, merely saying sometimes, it's not really a bad thing if some sorts of behaviors get toned down, that sometimes being an asshole isn't necessarily a problem - and not in a culture where many have entitlement issue and play tough just for the sake of 'feeling stronger' where in fact what it takes to help the community, they wouldn't do.

It was more a remark on gamers' culture as I know of it, than commending bullying behavior online, if that makes sense.

 

[Barberian]

Most of the time I take on people who themselves are being asshats. Is that an excuse? No, not really. I've still been doing it, but I have toned it down some. I'm more selective of targets who are dumping all over everybody else. I wait for them to make the first move. I've been told a few times to stfu by others in the game. I usually go silent once a mundane (other player) tells me to throttle back.

It's just weird for me to be an asshat on purpose, and having fun at it (not job related). I don't think this is permanent, and I will try to explore the hate deep inside that is driving this while it's in effect.

 

[5line]

I've found my life is simpler if I keep my trolling digital. It allows me to get it out of my system without burning any bridges. I mean who doesn't love pouncing on a self-proclaimed f*ck-tard? Its actually kind of fun to ridicule "ass-hats". I can't wait to get a gaming console. That would take my trolling habit to a whole new level. Teabags and verbally abusing 13 y/o's galore!

 

[5line]

who am i foolin, those 13 y/o's would kick my ass.....