I've Told A Supervisor At Work About My PTSD

[jsunshine]

Afetr taking a few days off work on sick leave (I'd stated that I had a stomach bug when in reality my panic attacks have become horribly frequent and I'm disassociating frequently). I had to report to a Supervisor for a Return to Work meeting today. My boss is off on holiday this week so the meeting was with a different boss I've known and liked for a year and a half.

I ended up telling her how things have been hard for me recently and that I suffer from PTSD. I apologised for not telling them sooner but she accepted that it's something that doesn't always rear it's ugly head in ways my colleagues would notice.

I'm very nervous as she is going to tell my boss when he returns to work on Monday so he can start the ball rolling and involve Occupational health dept at work. They can also contact my private health care provider to see what services can help me.

I explained to the supervisor that I'd left counselling to start work a year and a half ago only because I'd waited 15 month with the NHS for an appointment with the Phsychologist to start CBT. When I finally got to start the CBT I was a lot better than I had been previously and it was highly emotional to go through past painful experiences with her. We didn't get along great but I tried as best I could.

The supervisor at work has stated that because I took private healthcare out when I started working for them I may be able to get an appointment in around 2-3 weeks!!! I waited 15 months when I was at crisis point, my marriage ended, I couldn't leave the house and I thought I was going mad, yet I had to wait 15 months.

I'm scared, nervous, nauseous and distressed at the thought of counselling/therapy again but I know I need to finish what I started.

Thanks for reading.

 

[nie]

Jsunshine,

It is a big step to go into counseling. I have found it very helpful, but difficult none the less. I wish you the best of luck.

Nie

 

[Irton Pike]

I have been going through a similar process, coming out at work. It has been fraught at times. My advice is to go to your union who can help you ease through things. PTSd is recognised disability in the UK and you have lot of rights. You cannot be discriminated against because of it. The law is with you. I find it enormously comfoting after having my line management making life enormously difficult for two years plus. Some very dirty tricks have been oplayed on me. I hope we are doing the right thing!

 

[dust]

Hi,

I agree with Irton, work should take this seriously and the DDA is there to protect you.

You say you had to wait 15 months for therapy when you were at crisis point? I had the same experience, only I didn't wait - just got myself a very good therapist. My doctor was great, but the system just didn't kick in. Full-blown PTSD is one of the most terrible things I have experienced and it is awful that there isn't on-demand support.

Mental health is just so uncool!

Am I wrong there? Does anyone in the UK have a different experience of being supported while full-blown? Would like to know.

 

[Irton Pike]

I went to the quacks with real bad falling apart type symptoms at easter 2007 and was told i could go on a two year waiting list to see a psychologist. In the meantime i could have as many drugs as i liked!

No thanks.

I carried on seeing a counciller at work, intermittantly as I did improve, only for events at work to knock me down again. Eventually, about 4 weeks ago i started mobilising HR and OH and my union at work. I didn't do it previously as i was being threatened with the sack for making trouble. I wish i had done so, but i was in such a mess and my management exploited my fears.

 

[dust]

Yes, I managed to avoid the drugs as well - though, in hindsight I wonder if the drugs would have taken the edge off it :)

I miraculously managed to keep it together at work. I was professional and contained (this was a massive effort) and didn't fall out with anyone! Can't brag in the same way when it comes to my personal life...

 

[Irton Pike]

I kept everything in at work for over a year and only came out because i was being deliberately attacked for my symptoms, and was eventually physically attacked by my manager as well.

I was quite professional throughout, but i won't work under threat of violence.

 

[piglet]

I've had a similar experience. The NHS psychologist gave me a provisional diagnosis, but there was a waiting list of 12 months for the confirmation session. I would have lost my job by then, so I went private. My employer is not very helpful. I have union involvement and employment tribunal coming up. If you want to know further details, it's all available in my "anger issues" thread.

Fortunately for me, I am one of those compartmentalisation people, so I was able to continue working despite bringing legal proceedings against my employer. At the moment, I have been signed off sick due to being overloaded with work again - line manager was not in a position to lighten my load, as we are 2 full timers down already in our department. It's 3 now. :dontknow:

By the way - congratulations on having the courage to tell your supervisor, as it's a really big thing. I sincerely hope that you have a decent employer so that work becomes less stressful!

 

[Arcticboy1970]

Just to throw the management thing in there, I am a manager with government and have slowly over the past four years told my superiors, that was tough at first, though things have gone well since they realized that I wasn't gonig to "flipout" all the time. Then recently I have told some of my subordinates. This was even harder than letting my superiors know. Even though there really is no shame in suffering from PTSD sometimes I have felt that my staff would look down on e because of it. I am a natural leader though, I do it without even realizing it, it is just who I am. They have continued to see that leader, with a little more humanity than before but they still follow and I think a few of the respect me more asa result of me telling them. We'll see as time goes on. I have to say though that not having to hide has reduced my anxiety immensly at times.

 

[NarcSis]

I had to let some of my supervisors and a union rep in on my diagnosis - since then I cannot help but feel they have been out to get me. In my profession one would think that there would be more sympathy and assistance rather than persecution. I am considering a career change...and I love my job, it completes me.
I applaud you on trying counselling again. It takes alot of courage to want to face this hurt called PTSD. Stay strong, eventually it hurts less; I have to believe it does.

 

[sticks-and-stones]

Does anyone in the UK have a different experience of being supported while full-blown? Would like to know.

I'm in the UK and was quite lucky with how quickly I got seen.

I had nobody when I first started got my first panic attack (but I was able to look online and buy a book that helped me deal with my later panic attacks) but it was in the middle of my summer holidays and I was working as a welfare assistant - and so I was the one doing the looking after, rather than being looked after.
My symptoms got worse, so when I got back to Uni in October however, I was able to start getting help. It took me just about a month to get to see a counsellor (not without a fight) but at least then I was able to get seen quickly and learn some effective coping techniques.

I love being a student - I have a very supportive doctor, but if I'd had to wait on the NHS it would probably have been so much longer than what actually happened with the student support services.

Just my experience. I hope I'm not the only one here who didn't have to wait for months to get help...

 

[maria]

It sounds like a crack pot system. But the US has got its own bureaucratic problems. At one point in my life I had several problems all at once. I lost my housing, broke my write and lost my job. I had to be hospitalized because I was suicidal. I had to have some financial support because I'd exhausted what little savings I had.

The government does recognize psychological disability, but going through all the interviews and paperwork when one is a basket case makes getting it nearly impossible. I was very lucky to have a counselor who went with me to the interviews and helped me fill out the reams of paperwork. Also I suspect that the evaluation of the doctor at the hospital played a big part.

As I said, I was lucky. I could never have done it on my own.

maria