Just Joking

[Dynamic]

Shout out to all my fingers, I can count on all of them.

 

[LuckiLee]

I was going to tell a joke about time travel but you guys didn't like it.

 

[LuckiLee]

What did one saggy boob say to the other?

 

[LuckiLee]

We better perk up or people will think we're nuts.

 

[Friday]

@LuckiLee LMFAO.

 

[RachelBigby]

I made a list of ten funny puns. I sent it to my friend hoping they would make her smile.

No pun in ten did.

 

[Freddyt]

My Neighbor always seems to hang up his laundry on sunny days, but never on rainy days. One day I decided to ask him how he always knew which days to hang his laundry.
"Well," he explained, "if I wake up and my wife is lying on her side, I know it's going to rain and I shouldn't hang my laundry. If I wake up and she's lying on her front, I know it's not going to rain and I should hang my laundry."

"That's a very interesting method," I replied, "but what if she's lying on her back?"

"Ah, those days," he said, "I have better things to do than laundry!"

 

[Freddyt]

I took the shell off of my racing snail, thinking it would make him faster. But if anything, it made him more sluggish.

There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. (…Only a fraction of people will get this clean joke.)

What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.

I can never take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him. I guess that’s what I get for buying a pure bread dog.

Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie.

 

[RachelBigby]

Here’s a fun we trauma survivors might enjoy…

My therapist said I don’t articulate my emotions. Can’t say I’m surprised.

 

[Friday]

Traditions are just peer pressure from dead people.

 

[Freddyt]

Ego and Super-ego walk into a bar. The bartender looks at hem and says "I'm going to need to see some ID"

 

[user27357]

someone stole my prozac. I hope they are happy.