My appointment with my psych and my brief text conversation with my therapist have left me more confused than when I first started.
I swear I can hear Do I Stay or Do I Go Now playing in the background of my life.
The psych made it crystal clear that she thinks I should be out on disability- be that short, long, or SSI and it SOUNDED like she was saying full- not partial.
She pushed till I gave in and she's calling my neuro to get something together and seems sure that this means I can get the SSI in pretty short order.
yeeeeahhh.. sure. whatever you say.
My THERAPIST on the other hand was still, at last conversation (text 20 min ago) talking about me having a conversation with my supervisor to see if they would fight me going out on unemployment and leaving before the 20th of July.
What the actual f*ck?
Add to this the anniversaries, the screaming headache, and fact that I LITERALLY just found out that my therapist failed to mention that he was going on vacation overseas starting tomorrow and I've thrown in the towel on the day. Someone wanting to interview me for a full time position just dropped me an email wanting to Skype with me today. Today would be the only day I am available and I'm dodging this guy. I don't have the mental oomph to do a decent interview for anything- even flipping hamburgers.
Don't get me wrong, my psych listened to all my concerns about going out on disability and pretty well shot them all down, and said she felt that it was pretty damned important that I leave this town, get back to CA and not work but rather heal. I would rather not lose everything I've every worked for- including my career.
I'm not closer to an answer than I was yesterday. In a way I feel further from one.