Lgbt With Ptsd

[Fadeaway]

@Esterio
Disclaimer: anyone who is sexually fluid please feel free to correct me if I am wrong.

From what I understand, it is when your sexual orientation fluctuates. Someone who is sexually fluid can identify as being 100% straight sometimes and at that specific point in their lives they are only attracted to the opposite sex. At other times in their lives, their sexual attraction can shift to same sex only attraction. At other points in their life they may be attracted to both. So basically, the sex of the person they are attracted to is not consistent throughout their life. It changes.

So sexually fluid would be what you identified as instead of gay, straight, bi or other.

 

[Esterio]

@Esterio
Disclaimer: anyone who is sexually fluid please feel free to correct me i...

No I think when I identify as straight it was wish full thinking. When I identify as gay I have given in to what happened and I really didn't have a choice. I haven't let anyone touch me but in 17 years all but once and I was absolutely terrified so I don't know if I would be fluid sexually I only think I'm gay but when I came out I never found anyone to be with that I felt anything in common. So then I fell for a woman and we were married for eleven years what a mistake we hardly had sex as I couldn't be comfortable with touching. So maybe I'm only sexual to me.

 

[Lola Nocheprieta]

Just stumbled across this thread, I know it's old but thought I'd throw my hat in the ring.

Lesbian (femme) in interracial relationship with a woman (butch) ... this summer will make 24 years (8 years legally married!) Raised her little sister, who now has 2 kids of her own (I call myself Tiabuela, Aunt Grandma in Spanish.) Both families cool with each other. We.are.veddy.fortunate. Was active in LGBT youth rights and part of Queer Nation in NYC in the early '90s. f*cking old married couple now with creaky knees.

cPTSD from early and continuous sexual abuse, also impacts relationship and intimacy. The PTSD, MDD, ADHD all are stressors on the relationship, but I couldn't ask for a better supporter.

*throws rainbow glitter back at @Ice_Fire, and sets disco ball spinning for @Ms Spock*

 

[ms spock]

***twirls around***

 

[Mashed Potatoes]

I'm straight and have no idea what most of those words mean but y'all have PTSD in some form which means you're part of the same crowd Im in so I wanted to say hi :) Wishing us all more good days than bad <3

 

[Lola Nocheprieta]

***twirls around***

Dancing queen!!! *claps delightedly and joins Ms S on the dance floor*

 

[Lola Nocheprieta]

I'm straight and have no idea what most of those words mean but y'all have PTSD in some form wh...

Yup. That's what unites us. Wishing you same.

 

[Muttly]

This is a bit weird. I was thinking last night that I would dig around and see if there was a thread like this.

These days I just identify as queer. I'm not so worried about all the specific labels. I transitioned (female to male) a few years ago and all my gender markers say male. I do feel gender fluid and that's probably because some of the others that live in this crazy DID brain are female. I am bisexual and very happily in a polyamory relationship. Right now I'm asexual but I'm not going to label myself with that. As far as that goes, I don't really know. The cPTSD is too much of a factor.

No I think when I identify as straight it was wish full thinking. When I identify as gay I have given in to what happened and I really didn't have a choice. I haven't let anyone touch me but in 17 years all but once and I was absolutely terrified so I don't know if I would be fluid sexually I only think I'm gay but when I came out I never found anyone to be with that I felt anything in common. .

It has taken me so long to sort myself out. I really couldn't figure out what was a result of the abuse and what was me. I have spent a long time being asexual and whenever I've tried to be sexual it hasn't worked out do to trauma triggers. I am bi and transgender and I used to spin my brain in circles wonder what was "real" and if I was just that way because of the abuse. I delayed transition my gender for decades because I had this fear it would turn out, I only wanted to transition because of some weird reaction to my past.

I also couldn't find anyone remotely like me. I didn't fit with any of the lgbtq people I knew and that made me doubt myself even more. After doing a lot of therapy work and exploring the lgbtq world on the internet I started to feel more comfortable with who I was. And then I stopped trying to put a label on myself and things really started to come together. I also don't worry so much about whether I've been forced into something because of my cPTSD. What I think about is what makes me happy and what is healthy. Except for some of the physical changes I've undergone transitioning my gender, none of this is permanent. I'm not trapped in some identity and can live my life as it applies to me at this time.

I have no idea if any of that will apply to you. If not ignore it and I apologize for going on and on.

 

[MisterCatLady]

I'm a lesbian and genderqueer. I don't like to identify as one or the other. I'm okay with "she" but I don't like it when someone directly calls me a "woman".

 

[Esterio]

Just stumbled across this thread, I know it's old but thought I'd throw my hat in the ring.

L...

Thanks for your post I really don't know what has caused all of this but i think i have other buried issues and i don't have a new diagnoses my PTSD was first diagnosed 18 years ago when i tried treatment but i was not able to continue it was to difficult and from what i have been reading in the last few days makes me think that i should be cPSTD as sexual abuse started before i started school and continued until i stopped it at 22. i have been in crashes near fatal and where there was fatalities, fires and i have had a lot of suside around me. i don't know what bothers me more the sexual abuse or the deaths i feel like they are two totally different parts of my PTSD. I'm just beginning to try to face this again and I will be starting EMDR therapy next week. So i remain hopeful and I am trying to remain positive

 

[Esterio]

***twirls around***

I don't feel that the abuse was my fault. I feel that it interfered with my sexuality and i didn't have any say. i was made to feel good about everything for the first several years after that i not sure how i felt. I do know that no matter what i don't feel that i belong to any identity. i do wish that i could have a gay relationship but it just never fits.

 

[Esterio]

This is a bit weird. I was thinking last night that I would dig around and see if there was a thread lik...

i appreciate your input. Thanks for your post. I seem to have a fear of intimacy for that matter i don't like to brush up against anyone male or female. it is all so confusing. i'm hoping starting therapy again is going to help me to answer some of these questions.
thanks again
Peace be safe