Living At Work

[TLight]

Coping......seems like that's what PTSD and life are all about, coping. Tolerating the intolerable.

I wonder if normals feel this way about life?
Tired of coping........want some reward sometimes.

Thanks for all your support guys.

 

[Katz2]

I think everyday folk do have problems, but never like this!! Your right we have to work twice as hard. Tlight your reward is making us all feel we are not alone:)

 

[TLight]

Thanks..i know, this is all so isolating.
Plus I have DID, so I have ALL THIS CRAP GOING ON INSIDE........CONFLICT INSIDE! Like everyone wants different things, needs different things.

Like I want to continue taking lessons with this trainer cause we are improving, then show and earn my bronze medal with the USDF, which will allow us to charge more at the barn. Childhood dream come true at 48..........but the others.......OH GOD..........they are like wanting to kill the trainer, run away from this whole thing, die........just be the stall cleaner and nothing else.

Total conflict in me. How the hell am I ever supposed to find some peace when I have all these different entities in me at each other's throats.

One day I'm excited about my lesson, one day I'm dreading it, one day I want to kill the trainer, one day I want out of this whole thing, one day I want to pursue this dream, at the same time I'm hating it.