Lockdown Stagnation

[whiteraven]

I know it sounds cliche, but the Nike commercial is correct. "Just Do It"

Yep. Cliched.

But, putting one leg in front of the other, even though they felt like they had 60 pound weights on each leg, oddly after my body started to move and do the thing, like wash dishes, or take out trash, etc. it got easier and then a natural momentum came.

Except it doesn't. I push myself to do things I have to do every day. It does NOT get easier. If I don't have to do, I don't when I'm feeling like this, because it requires an immense amount of energy - that I don't have - and it doesn't ever get better when I do it.

Thanks for replying.

 

[hithere]

@whiteraven may i ask if you are on medication? If so, perhaps you need a change? If not, perhaps medication may help you at this difficult time?

 

[Tinyflame]

I wish I could afford to be locked down. :(

@whiteraven I've heard it said procrastination is underlaid with fear +/ or dread. Sometimes we dread what we estimate will take longer than it would, or envision too much instead of doing one step. We also forget it will feel good when done. So, too, rewards along the way are good, too. And a reward can be small, or take only a few minutes.

With fear, there may be something that unearths the past, how we were treated or what we heard, etc.

But it's ok also to not always 'do'.

Good luck to you! :hug:

 

[whiteraven]

may i ask if you are on medication? If so, perhaps you need a change? If not, perhaps medication may help you at this difficult time?

Thanks, @hithere. No, not on medication. And I'll tell you why...I have tried nearly everything available (only ones I haven't tried are the newer ones with no generic. They are way too expensive, even with a discount card or insurance). They either didn't help at all or the side effects were so bad (and some long-term) that it wasn't worth it. I have started thinking about it again because I have had more suicidal thinking than I have in a long time, but I don't have insurance now (I am unemployed), so I can't afford the office visits required to monitor meds and I can't afford any more meds than I am taking now (which I am rationing).

I wish I could afford to be locked down. :(

I can't afford it, either. I have no money, no savings, and nothing coming in. I've had to get deferments on student loans, get medical bills cancelled (still working on that one; amazing how unforgiving the for profit hospitals are), am getting ready to get my mortgage put on hold for a few months, and am pulling money (which is taxable right now) from my IRA.

 

[Changing4Best]

Yup, I am stultified too. I was able to read at the start of all this (for pleasure) but no longer. It's so hard to concentrate. And house work? No go. I was able to do a bit of Bible study this morning, because I thought it might help me. It did somewhat, so I was pleased about that. However, I was not able to keep it going for more than an hour.

 

[WarOfRoses]

I'm the type of person who needs to leave the house in order to get things done.

I once worked for a company who gave me the opportunity to work from home three days a week but I still went into the office as I'm not productive and get distracted at home.

Same with any kind of workout or exercise. I can't do it at home, I need the two venues to be completely separate.

So when I got locked down I went into a spiral. My symptoms worsened and the memories came flooding back.

I do about 2 hours of gardening but then all I want to do is collapse on my sofa or have an afternoon nap.

I'm usually very neat and tidy but now the house is messy.

I just cant believe this has happened!.. my life was going so well and I got blind sided.

I'm full of so much anger.

 

[Changing4Best]

@WarOfRoses my trick on doing house work is to do a little bit of it at a time. I cleared out a dresser drawer the other day and that felt good. Don't try to do too much at a time. Also, it does not have to be perfect. Any improvement is a major breakthrough. Go for the tiny goals first.

 

[Mach123]

I like doing the housework but there is more in it than that. I am able to do it or I permission or I don’t stop myself? Dunno. Probably because I’m a man and I’m not supposed to like being a housewife?

I have a loose weekly routine.

We are still on the same routine minus the girls going to their programs. The ymca called yesterday and checked in on us and wanted to give us some advice on home exercise.

I said we are walking close to 5 mi daily weather permitting.

Her tone of voice when she said “5 miles?”
Made me think we are in the upper echelon
As far as keeping up the exercise goes.

 

[WarOfRoses]

@Changing4Best yes I agree doing a little bit here and there makes me feel good.

@Mach123 I walk the dog every morning and it's a great way to start the day.

I also made a list this morning that I said I would make sure I get done. I have completed 4 of the 5 on the list. One more to go!