Looking Over-confident When Extremely Anxious

[anonymous]

I have been incredibly anxious the past 4 days since I stirred up some old trauma in my last therapy session. For some reason, I apparently look and sound quite confident the past 4 days, when I don't feel that way at all. Not one bit. In any way. When I mean to express hesitation, I sound really sure. This isn't normal to me, and everyone in my life is noticing. I'm worried about it. I don't like being incongruent or giving off messages that are not authentic. I was a really shy girl as a kid, and I have been less shy as an adult... but this is very different for me.

Anyone else experience anything like this? Anyone know what this is?

 

[pixel]

You sound like you might be dissociating.

A useful coping mechanism to deal with trauma. lots of people here experience this too.

most likely you will return to your normal quite soon :wacky:

 

[sedna]

I have been incredibly anxious the past 4 days since I stirred up some old trauma in my last therapy...

Hi anon.

Yeah. I actually just had this today, but I've had it before a few times also.

I've been almost exclusively at home and isolated for about three months, then this week I went back to work, and started a PTSD in person group therapy for the first time. I actually joined this forum because I was so freaked out by joining ( and paying for ) the group therapy that I wanted to practice anonymously online talking about this stuff, and myself, which I'm not used to.

The group therapy was scary, but everyone there looked a lot more freaked out than I did, to the point where at the end the members were commenting to me that I seem to be very together and blah blah blah....I listened to their stories and feelings, Im not in any better shape than they are. I have absolutely no idea why I seemed so confident and emotionally steady either. I read Pixels comment, and pixel may be right it was a disassociation of some kind.

Possibly were not as effed up as we used to be. Its kinda hard to tell.

Sorry I cant offer anything helpful, I can just say I had the same experience today. :confused:

 

[EveHarrington]

I'm going to bet that you always appear over confident and it's a go-to mechanism for you. The sad thing is that it can and will scare people away. I think it might be something that isn't isolated to periods of anxiety, just that it's noticeable to you during anxious times.

 

[Suzetig]

I'm like this all the time, I can appear supremely confident when I'm actually terrified. For me it's a form is dissociation where I can disconnect or push away the anxiety to where I look fine, but scratch the surface and all isn't well. And because it's a superficial appearance thing, it's also very fragile. At one point I thought I was genuinely this "nothing touches me" kind of person, so imagine my shock when that all fell to bits.

I've been working hard to be more integrated, ie not to dissociate. The problem is that it's such a good tool for me, it means I sail through job interviews, difficult meetings etc because I just don't acknowledge that I feel anxious. I know though that I'm storing up problems for later if I never give space to the anxiety so I'm trying to stay more present and actually address the anxious feelings.

I find breathing exercises, grounding, reassuring myself that I'll be ok and sometimes making space to be tearful or upset all help me in the long run. There are still times that I'll appear way more sure of myself than I feel, but I'm aware of it now in a way that I wasn't before.

 

[SoSadGuilty]

I can identify with @anonymous, @coco9 and @Suzetig in that I appear very confident in some situations and I get told I'm very together and calm. I wouldn't say I appear over confident but I definitely can be disintegrating internally while being super competent and confident externally. For example I apparently interview really well and so when I'm working in the job people are always surprised by how stressed I can get or by how much I worry. I guess you fake it until you make it.... :(