Lost The Battle

[Ghostybear73]

Well, I gave in and sent Eric out to buy me a pack of cigarettes. As I sit here watching my daughter grade papers (which I have to regrade, so she uses pencil) and letting my Macaw floss my teeth (I know that sounds odd), I just couldn't take it. There are so many wonderful things that go on in my house I want to be able to enjoy some. The PTSD seems to be taking a lot away, but I can't let all of it go.

As he leaves the house to go to the store, he says, "would you like me to buy you a Pepsi". Ahhhhh, my comfort food. It has been so long since I have had one that I said yes. We are very health conscious in my house. We eat right, go to the gym, I coach my daughters soccer team and that's a lot of exercise running after a bunch of 8 year olds with a soccer ball.

Yet, with all that I gave in and am having a smoke and a pepsi. I am so dissapointed in myself, but I can't seem to regret it.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

It's okay to do something for yourself every once in awhile. I do think smoking is a terrible habit but that is not the point, the point is the main idea which is...it's okay to be nice to yourself.

 

[Ghostybear73]

@Ayesha :D

Thank You

 

[franciemarnie]

We need our comforts sometimes. Tomorrow is another day (says Franciemarnie taking a furtive drag.)

 

[Ghostybear73]

@franciemarnie, at least I'm not alone. I have been smoke free for since the beginning of the year. I am pushing the envelope though, I have major surgery coming up and I have to quit in order to heal properly (or so they say). In the last year I have had 5 different surgery's and smoked throughout all of them without problems, but those didn't put me down for two months.

I am however, seeing your statement as a positive. I can and will quit, just not today as tomorrow is indeed another day.

:)

Thank you!

 

[Barconian]

You can't fail if you don't surrender @Ghostybear73 You have my best wishes with your surgery smoking or not :)