Mom's Mental Illness

[Lizzie Bell]

My mom has never been diagnosed, but both my therapists have said it sounds like she has schizo typal personality disorder. I wonder if she was abused by her father. It was he, my grandfather, that molested me when I was 4. Is it possible her problems stem from abuse. Perhaps her father had a mental disorder too. Any thoughts out there on this subject?

 

[Lizzie Bell]

It is very difficult to have a relationship with my mom, due to the above problems. I guess that's why I live 1600 miles away from her. I used to cry when I saw other mothers with their daughters, but I have learned to deal with her as a sick individual. I don't hate her anymore, but know I could never live near her.

My dad is very passive, and gives into her tantrums. As a child it was like walking on eggshells. I never knew what mood she was going to be in. I remember thinking I wish she was one way or another, either in a good mood or bad. I couldn't stand not knowing when I came home from school. I was always tense, never relaxed. Always on guard against her tirades.

Her rages were horible! She was so irrational and still is. When I saw her this summer, she thought a man was oogling my 5 year old neice. She has always been this way, which makes me wonder if she was sexually abused by her father, as I was.

Anyway, onward and upward as they say. I just wish I had more concrete explanations.

 

[Anna]

My mother was also ill. She had therapy, a psychiatrist and took various psychoactive medications to help deal with her illness.

It is still no excuse for her behaviour towards me though, or the problems she caused me. Abuse can of course cause mental illness. It can also be genetic. It is quite common in the nature/nurture debate.

You should concentrate on yourself and healing though. I quite often as well wrap myself up in the problems of other people. If you are wondering, maybe you should just ask her why she is so protective or paranoid? I would not ask her straight out if she was abused as she may not remember or it could make her ill. You could try and get her to open up.

I did this a few months ok and found out some things had happened to my mother as well. Slowly bit by bit the jigsaw puzzle is coming into place.

 

[Ice_Fire]

My mum sounds a lot like yours unfortunately. Mood swings, awful tantrums with no apparent cause. I always wondered if my mum was abused by her parent(s). They died before I was born, but she has always hated her dad, refuses to talk about him. I asked my aunties what he was like and they said that he always 'doted' on my mum. So, I don't know. I wish I could offer you some advice...