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Childhood Mother, Abuse In All Ways

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I was a sweet little girl, dreamy and gentle. I loved my mom a whole lot, I mean she was my mom. So she had me really young and started doing drugs when I was young and drunken anger of course. there was one memory when I was 9 that in fact is the scariest thing. I got scared out of my body, literally, astrally projected from this experience. she gripped me by my hair and pulled me to my knees. I had nightmares ever since of feeling stuck and unprotected. my dad and mom weren't together so when I went to my dad's I felt safe, still untrusting but safer. my step mom would wake me up and I would jump awake panicing , crying. my dad wanted to do something so bad but I was afraid to speak because of the repercussions and punishments of my mom. After all this pain today I realized my strength. I am not alone anymore, I can share this. so I researched hair pulling and it's biblical meaning. Hair is represented as protection , covering. my mom was in my business all the time. I had sex way to early and still feel like a virgin. I was raped twice and done so many drugs idk how, I do not know how I'm alive. the Lord is the only answer.
 
I was a sweet little girl, dreamy and gentle. I loved my mom a whole lot, I mean she was my mom....
It is amazing and wonderful that you are able to share what you have. It shows that you have made a huge step in processing your past trauma. I also come from an abusive home, and have noticed that the more I am able to talk about things with those I trust, the more I am able to move past it ... does that make sense?

Like you, I know I am stronger for having survived what I have. I know you are too!
 
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