Multiple Suicide Attempts

[Luni]

I think some of the feelings against the op here are related to an idea that there is something wrong with seeking attention, I've heard people say 'they're just seeking attention, they don't really want to die', as if somehow it is a lesser hurt.

People who view suicide attempts in that way, don't reach the point of asking what is it within that person that so desperately needs someone to listen, that they would put their life at risk, because they can't express those feelings in any other way.

I experience suicidal ideation, and I'm fortunate to recognise those thoughts as being connected to that feeling where I just want the shit in my mind to just stop, shut up and be quiet, but there is no way at that moment for that to happen. So the suicidal ideation is like fantasizing about a way to stop it, it's dreaming up the answer.

Far more dangerous, but less recognised as being suicidal (because there are no attempts), is the feeling that I just don't care. When on a whim, you see how far you can drive with your eyes shut, because you no longer care, and so you can. It feels free from pressure and anxiety, and it feels good to not worry if you live or die. But nobody sees those attempts.

Mental illness can be very subtle. It's an illness that affects the mind, and the thing we need to be able to work out, and communicate what our feelings are, is the mind. So, when the mind isn't working properly, we can't communicate what's happening inside of us in a sensible/logical way. So that communication comes in other ways.

 

[Ruvaw]

Those who succeed first time, they aren't within the unsure zone; they're clearly in the wanting to die and they don't let anyone know about it. They plan it, they ensure there are no failsafes or ways out during when the brain fights back to survive. Jumping off of a building, for example, removes all such things for people. Whilst it is said half way down they will change their mind, thus their brain is working against their conscious desires, there is nothing they can now do except impact and die.

Attempts is absolutely a scream for help... probably beyond cry for help, but scream!

No - not everyone who succeeds the first time meant to do it. I know two people whose death was defended as 'self inflicted but with no real intention to take their life'.

And I know someone who jumped off a building and survived.