Supporter My Husband Has Ptsd And I Need Support

[lissabest]

I am a 32 year old mother of four children, three of which have disabilities. My husband is a paramedic/firefighter and formerly abused as a child. I'm trying to learn about PTSD so I can be a better support to him. He has constant nightmares and flash backs. He just started trauma therapy but are there medications that might help too?
Thank you!!

 

[Deleted member 19804]

Hi @lissabest , welcome to the forum! You're doing a good thing reaching out here. I'm glad to hear your husband has started trauma therapy and that you're so committed to being there for him.

There are various kinds of meds that might be of help, but I can't recommend any as that is his doctor's job. What I can tell you is that many people on this forum are on various kinds of antidepressants, antipsychotics and other drugs that help them calm down and/or stay calm.

edit: woops, accidentally pressed the post reply button a little too quickly.

I like to explain PTSD as if it were a bug in a computer system (which represents your brain in this metaphor), that causes the system (your brain) to crash very often. You can restart the system, trying it again, but the computer will keep crashing. If you really want to get rid of the bug, you will have to search for it and probably attack from various angles, as it is embedded really deeply into your brain. That is where therapy comes in: it helps you to slowly get to the root of the problem. It will be a lot of hard work and it will be very tough, but if you keep it up you can eventually get to the bug that is PTSD and start fighting it.

Does that make sense?

 

[Friday]

Yes & No.

Meds can be a godsend, or a huge trial, but most often are both. Meaning that no one reacts the same way to them (there are literally hundreds of options, although probably only 50 or so common ones), and the only way to find the "right" one is to make educated guesses, and experiment.

The other thing to consider is that, as a first responder, many of those meds mean he won't be able to work. At the very least not in the field/ in any position where people's lives are in his hands (either patients or crew), and often not at all. Other meds -even if they're approved for on duty use- he won't be able to work because they flatten him, or affect his judgement, or make things worse.

Which makes the medication route very full of "ifs, ands, buts, & maybes".

 

[intothelight]

@lissabest Welcome to the forum! :)

This site is a great place to learn about PTSD and there is an entire section for supporters so you can also get some support for yourself. Taking care of a family can be pretty exhausting in and of itself, but when you add the extra requirements of special needs children and a spouse that is dealing with major issues, it can really take a toll on the supporter. Take some time to do things for yourself so that you don't burn out.

It isn't unusual for a person in therapy to have a spike in symptoms and it is important that your husband bring this up to discuss it with his therapist. Medication can help and there are also many other tools that can help him manage the symptoms or lessen their impact. However, the decision will be his and it will up to him to incorporate the changes into his life.