My Introduction

[helpcj]

Hi everyone,
I'm not sure I will stay on this forum, but I had to sign up to look around so here I am.

I began having symptoms of...something...when I was 18. Back then, it looked like OCD, then depression. I have had many episodes of depression throughout my life. Have been in counseling, therapy, 12 step groups, healing prayer groups, conferences, you name it. Through it all, no one ever diagnosed me with PTSD...or more accurately, CPTSD.

My husband recently looked at the symptoms and we've been on a quest for some effective help ever since...(that was about three weeks ago.) I am considering going to an inpatient treatment facility that seems to know a lot about CPTSD and abuse and trauma, which are my life story. I was so excited to find out about Complex PTSD and the research that has been done on victims of child abuse. Like many others, I thought I was crazy, and was told (by my abusers) to "get over it."

I am 46, have not been able to hold a job, take a class, or achieve any sort of goals because I always crash and end up in a heap of pain. Until now, I have just rested awhile and then got up and did the whole thing over again. I seem to get much worse in winter, (is that common?)

Anyway, my interest is mostly in the Complex PTSD thread for obvious reasons. What is so frustrating about this is that I have been unable to help myself. That feeling of being stuck is so hard. I feel hopeless and worried that I will never feel better.

I have tried EMDR to no avail, but I have an appointment to try Brain spotting, which uses auditory stimulation and somatic processing. That might work better for me as I am an auditory learner and have lots of body sensations or "memories."

Thanks for listening.

 

[goingonhope]

Hello Helpcj, & Welcome to the forum!

Some people consider things near a lifetime and never get around to it. If you're in doubt and in a position to go into an inpatient treatment facility that as you state: "knows a lot about CPTSD and abuse and trauma", then if I were you I'd decide and cease considering, as too many obstacles may later present themselves; but that's what I'd do.

For you, if it is at all possible to seek help inpatient in such a facility, then decide: Yes, I'll go. Or, No I won't!

As helpful as a forum as you've now found, it is not a treatment facility and if pandora's box of abuse and trauma gets opened here, which IMHO, it's apt too, and it's beyond painful what you find that may spill out, then you may wish you'd chosen in-patient.

Just my two-cents and with my best wishes for you and your husband.

I am considering going to an inpatient treatment facility that seems to know a lot about CPTSD and abuse and trauma, which are my life story.

You're a registered forum member, and nothing has to be all/or nothing so heck help yourself by finding out what's what, and begin any recommended treatment, follow-thru, follow-thru, follow-thru, and stay and/or visit here anytime.

Sincerely,
goingonhope and would much prefer at this time in my life to be goingon-inpatientPtsdcare, but simply not in the cards.

Take care of yourself now!

 

[Clydiechick]

Welcome

Try everything, different people get results from different therapy.

By 'pain' do you mean physical or mental? If physical, it definately gets worse in winter.

Take care, stick with the forum, you will find some good stuff here.

Clydie

 

[helpcj]

Welcome


By 'pain' do you mean physical or mental? If physical, it definately gets worse in winter.

Clydie

No, its my psychic pain that seems to intensify in winter. Perhaps its a trigger of some sort.

Having talked to the folks at the treatment facility a bit today, I'm leaning toward going. Money is an issue, of course. Praying praying praying that our insurance company "approves" and chips in a bit.

 

[Gloria]

Dear Helpcj,

Welcome to the forum! I am new on the forum myself but I have been diagnosed with C-PTSD. Since I was so good at stuffing my feelings and hiding my symptoms, I didn't want to continue treatment for my childhood traumas. But my body would not stuff and forget and I began to get physical symptoms associated with PTSD. Thankfully, I listened to my body and got treatment. Miraculously, as I confront my demons with my therapist, my physical health has returned.

I am so glad you are here! You will find the information on this site invaluable! Welcome!!

Gloria

 

[helpcj]

What Next?

OK, I've introduced myself, looked around... I need to "establish" myself, but I don't seem to be able to start new topics. I am a new member that wants to talk about Complex PTSD...any takers?

:crazy: For instance, how does one begin to change? How does one get past the trembling, the severe sadness, the suicidal thoughts...and the tendency for all the feelings and symptoms to vanish once one sits down in front of a therapist? How does one begin to unpack the PTSD baggage and leave it behind?