emilypaige1112
New Here
Hey everyone! My name is Emily & I am new here. Thankyou for taking the time to read my post.
So a little back history.
My wife & I have been together for 7 years and married one. We have a beautiful almost one year old daughter together. My wife carried her , and she was conceived through artifical insemination.
While we were dating I knew that my wife had been sexually abused as a child. But I didn't know the extreme nature of it until after my daughter was born.
During my wife's pregnancy she examined extremely anxious. Everything she did she was so worried it would harm the baby. I remember her worrying all the time that we would lose the baby. I just thought it was because we were first time parents. She also PRAYED for a little boy. When we found out we were having a little girl, I remember she was so upset , she even felt guilty because she was upset. I truly believe now it was because she felt like our daughter would be in greater danger than a son would be.
So fast track, my wife gives birth. & hell breaks loose. Her family treats her like shit. Refused to even seen her. Never came to see the baby. Nothing. Talked badly to my wife, called her and I both all kinds of names, to this day we still don't know why, no one would tell us. When we came home from the hospital , I would find her sitting in the bathroom floor crying her eyes out. I remember telling my mom, and everyone thinking she has ppd. At her 6 week follow up this was still occurring. The doctor said it was just her hormones leveling out. But as time went on, it got worse. She had a constant fear of something bad happening to our daughter. At the time we had a nurse coming out to check on our daughter ( it was provided for us by our health insurance ) , and we spoke with her about it. She recommend that a counselor come out and speak with cheyenne just to make sure everything was okay. The counselor came out , and we started talking. By this time my daughter was about 6 months old. Keep in mind, things were getting worse. We were fighting every day, my wife was not able to be intamate in any way shape of form, she is a stay at home mom, and was unable to even get off the couch half the time. So the counselor diagnosed her with PTSD due to her sexual abuse as a child.
After hearing some of my what said to the counselor , I can understand how it is difficult for her. My wife was being sexual abused by her uncle from age around 11-13. Her uncle lived with her grandparents and after school that is where she had to stay. Once she finally told her family what went on, they called her mean names, said it wasn't his fault because he has brain damage (from a wreck where he was driving drunk) , and that was that. She was still forced to go over there!!! No one protected her. No one.
We are now almost 12 months into counseling. My wife just started taking two different kinds of medicine as prescribed by her psychiatrist.
So here is my main question: before it was bad because we did fight, over little things. Like my wife won't ever stay on her phone, she doesn't help, things like that. But now, it's worse. She's been on her medicine about 2 weeks now, at first she was kinda irritable, then she was kinda back to her old self, listening to music , being happy, then literally the next day she's talking about a separation. Saying that she is unhappy and she knows I am. She said that she thinks she loves me, but her mind is telling her to run far away from me. That because I was there through all the PTSD, she is associating me with something bad. Please someone explain this to me. What is going on? Because I was her support she wants to leave ? I mean what happens if once her PTSD is managed, she really decides she wants to leave? Any advice or kind words is greatly appreciated. Thankyou.
So a little back history.
My wife & I have been together for 7 years and married one. We have a beautiful almost one year old daughter together. My wife carried her , and she was conceived through artifical insemination.
While we were dating I knew that my wife had been sexually abused as a child. But I didn't know the extreme nature of it until after my daughter was born.
During my wife's pregnancy she examined extremely anxious. Everything she did she was so worried it would harm the baby. I remember her worrying all the time that we would lose the baby. I just thought it was because we were first time parents. She also PRAYED for a little boy. When we found out we were having a little girl, I remember she was so upset , she even felt guilty because she was upset. I truly believe now it was because she felt like our daughter would be in greater danger than a son would be.
So fast track, my wife gives birth. & hell breaks loose. Her family treats her like shit. Refused to even seen her. Never came to see the baby. Nothing. Talked badly to my wife, called her and I both all kinds of names, to this day we still don't know why, no one would tell us. When we came home from the hospital , I would find her sitting in the bathroom floor crying her eyes out. I remember telling my mom, and everyone thinking she has ppd. At her 6 week follow up this was still occurring. The doctor said it was just her hormones leveling out. But as time went on, it got worse. She had a constant fear of something bad happening to our daughter. At the time we had a nurse coming out to check on our daughter ( it was provided for us by our health insurance ) , and we spoke with her about it. She recommend that a counselor come out and speak with cheyenne just to make sure everything was okay. The counselor came out , and we started talking. By this time my daughter was about 6 months old. Keep in mind, things were getting worse. We were fighting every day, my wife was not able to be intamate in any way shape of form, she is a stay at home mom, and was unable to even get off the couch half the time. So the counselor diagnosed her with PTSD due to her sexual abuse as a child.
After hearing some of my what said to the counselor , I can understand how it is difficult for her. My wife was being sexual abused by her uncle from age around 11-13. Her uncle lived with her grandparents and after school that is where she had to stay. Once she finally told her family what went on, they called her mean names, said it wasn't his fault because he has brain damage (from a wreck where he was driving drunk) , and that was that. She was still forced to go over there!!! No one protected her. No one.
We are now almost 12 months into counseling. My wife just started taking two different kinds of medicine as prescribed by her psychiatrist.
So here is my main question: before it was bad because we did fight, over little things. Like my wife won't ever stay on her phone, she doesn't help, things like that. But now, it's worse. She's been on her medicine about 2 weeks now, at first she was kinda irritable, then she was kinda back to her old self, listening to music , being happy, then literally the next day she's talking about a separation. Saying that she is unhappy and she knows I am. She said that she thinks she loves me, but her mind is telling her to run far away from me. That because I was there through all the PTSD, she is associating me with something bad. Please someone explain this to me. What is going on? Because I was her support she wants to leave ? I mean what happens if once her PTSD is managed, she really decides she wants to leave? Any advice or kind words is greatly appreciated. Thankyou.
