My parents deny me truth

[Drtridr1012]

When I was 2 years old, I was abused, and my parents haven't owned up to knowing that it happened. I am constantly told it is a delusion. It wasn't them, I know who it was for a fact, because it happened right after my first memory. I don't know how to talk to anyone that is affected by it directly, so I am seeking some wisdom. Has anyone encountered something similar and found a solution that is agreeable for all? I'm 30 and I've never had sex because of it, I have just never had enough confidence around girls I like or love unless I'm drunk, and i wouldn't want to be drunk because I want it to be romantic. I wad diagnosed with PTSD and adhd and social anxiety, all comorbid, and i am frequently frustrated. I don't realize things socially unless I am inebriated, and i take social interactions that dont go well hard. I am above average but sometimes I just wish/used to wish that I was normal. I am in love with a girl who is my twinflame whom i am telepathic with and i want to be a better man for her. She doesn't understand what it's like to be raped as a little kid. I can't confront the source of my pain since he is dead. I just recently decided to reach out to the internet. Perhaps I should have sooner. I just want to be myself again, but with confidence. Spread some love!

 

[Ronin]

So... what sort of advice are you looking for, exactly?

How to deal with your abuser being dead / get closure?
How to deal with parents denying the abuse / not believing it?
How to disclose to your girl?
How to overcome social anxiety?

Something else?

IMO you might be surprised what all she does, or does not understand. Just dismissing it without even asking her is not realistic.

& Believing in that twin flame / telepathy stuff is likely not going to help either of you. She is a first relation, it sounds like, I get it, you are in love, but do yourself & her both a service and see her as a person, instead of a fantasy of a soul mate.

You can be both in love... & not setting the unrealistic expectations on the other person, while having only negative expectations in areas they might well be supportive, if only shared with.