General My so seems to be dissociating into parts and i don't know what to do

[hopelessly_helping]

Hello,

I am new here and I found this forum a couple days ago and have been combing through it to try and get some understanding of this. My SO has been dissociating more and more lately and while dissociated, she will interact with me as what I think is one of her parts. When she talks to me, she is clearly dealing with the aftermath of her adult trauma. I have been there to talk to her about it and tell her that she's safe and that I am there to help. I try to do some of the grounding techniques that we do when she is having panic attacks and we watch videos or I just hold her until she... comes back, I guess. Sometimes she talks about what happened to her, sometimes she just talks about her feelings of being alone with no one caring about her (which is what happened immediately after the trauma).

She always comes back and sometimes the length of time that she is "away" is only 5 minutes, sometimes it is several hours. During these times, I have seen several different types of behavior from her, all of them are understandable. She is usually just confused but open enough to my talking to her and reassurances. Several times now, though, she has been very angry and that she thinks that I am one of the people who abused her. She recognizes that I am not the aggressor but she thinks that I was in on it and yelled and screamed at me to get out. I did and waited outside for a bit until I heard her crying and when I came back in, she was more receptive to me and I was able to help her.

When she "comes back" she does not remember anything at all. Once she told me that she thought she had just had a flashback and my searching online led me to this forum.

I want to know if anyone has any ideas for why this suddenly started happening. She has never experienced anything like this before. It is interfering with her ability to work right now as she is afraid that she will have a flashback while at work and not be able to function there. They don't know anything about her cPTSD or anything like that and it is a new job that she really needs. We don't have insurance for counseling and we don't really have enough money right now for it either.

If there are any ideas or suggestions or advice, I would really appreciate it because I can get very overwhelmed by this situation and all I want to do is help her but I really don't know how to do that best. She has mentioned a couple times going to a place to check herself in for 72-hours but I don't know what that would help and I know that she would not be comfortable there.

Thank you so much for anyone who read this and any help is appreciated.

 

[Justmehere]

We don't have insurance for counseling and we don't really have enough money right now for it either.

If you are in the US, you can contact the United Way by dialing 211 from any US phone and they have a database of low cost counseling resources for those without insurance.

There can be many reasons why symptoms spike. Here is one model that might help: The Ptsd Cup Explanation

 

[Sweetpea76]

I wouldn't jump to "parts". People react to being triggered in different ways.

Nobody is going to be able to help or diagnose her except trained mental health professionals. If she feels the need to check herself in for a 72 hour hold I wouldn't stop her.

She needs treatment. This isn't going to be something she can fix on her own.

 

[shimmerz]

I am with @Justmehere. I would say for such a drastic change to occur, to be suddenly having flashbacks, that most likely there is a new form of stress going on with her.

You mention a new job. Is it possible that the stress of that job or something to do with that job is causing her reactivity? If not, is there something else that has changed in her world that may be triggering her up?

Sounds like you are a great supporter. More power to you and keep coming here for support if you are feeling alone in all of this. I know it can be scary.