Sufferer New And Hoping To Heal And Help.

[Tosca]

Hi everyone,

I'm not sure what is expected as an introduction but i'll give it a go.

I'm a 26 year old female. I was officially diagnosed with PTSD in January 2012 after I was raped whilst travelling in Asia.

I spent 3 months in a psychiatric hospital, being treated by the most amazing people. When I was discharged I treated it like I was 'fixed'. It's only now that I can admit that although I tried my best, through cognitive behavioural therapy, meditation, medication and group therapy, that my fight against PTSD is far from over. So in a nutshell, that's why I'm here. That and the fact that after 20 months of selfishness, I've become aware that I'm not the only person my trauma has affected. I've been in a relationship with a wonderful woman for 4 years, and the longer I've been deluded about the state of my mental health, the harder it's been on her. So I guess I'm here to ask for some advice that some of you may be kind enough to give, and also to learn how to make my illness less strenuous and destructive on my relationship and also on her personally.

Additionally, although I'm no expert, I hope I can help other sufferer's by listening, positively encouraging, and sharing.

Thank you for taking the time to read this,

T x

 

[Flyaway]

Hi Tosca, welcome :)

While its heartbreaking to hear why you're here, I'm glad you're reaching out. This site has made a huge difference to me - I hope it does for you too!

 

[kahlan]

Welcome to.the forum :) There are some very supportive people here and I wish you well.

 

[Man In Car]

Hi, have you heard of or considered mdma therapy ? It is not easy to find, as it is illegal, but there are therapists worldwide who provide safe secure places for you to journey with this incredible compound, and it really works to resolve and heal past trauma.

 

[Deleted member 20978]

Um. Not going to second the illegal use of Ecstasy; seems a bit random advice. No offense meant, Man In Car...

I think coming to these forums is a good step. In my very limited experience with acknowledging PTSD, it makes a big difference to be talking about it somewhere people can understand. That said, get some informed opinions and strongly consider some form of therapy beyond just talking. Somatic approaches like EMDR I've heard lots of positive things about (am looking for this myself), as they acknowledge that trauma is physiological, not just mental. Talk therapy is just mental, and talking a lot about trauma can stir up all the emotions without doing anything to resolve them.

Anyway welcome.

 

[DMerish]

:hug:Hi T x,

You sound like you're in a really good place. What I mean by that is that your awareness is quite high, and you've looked into many healing modalities. As described in the help pages (and you may have learned already), PTSD isn't something that just goes away and the path dealing with it is individual for each person, i.e. what works for one person may not work for another.

I was diagnosed in 1987. Leading a calm life, being active in nature and meditating has help me the most. I don't think of my PTSD as something to struggle with (although its affect on my daily life is). I think of it more as an annoyance: sometimes it's a big annoyance, but as annoyances go there is an ebb and flow. Periods of "remission" can occur and I've had several long blissful periods without symptoms.

My symptoms returned last December. I went down to the bottom of the ocean and I'm beginning to swim up to the surface now. I know the pattern - it will be another month or so before I can begin to swim to shore and a few more months before my life can get back to what it was. When I was at the bottom of the ocean, there was little I could do. Now I have to keep nudging myself to keep swimming. Good thing I have strong lungs!

I think it's important to learn what your needs are, what helps you, be kind to yourself, and ask for the support you need without expectation. Being flexible, communicating with others well, helps a lot.

Good luck on your journey Tosca and welcome to the forum. There are lots of supportive people here.
Drew

 

[intothelight]

Hi Tosca,

Welcome to MyPTSD forum! :)

I hope you find the information and support here beneficial to your healing.

Debbie