Hi everyone,
I've recently become friends with a fellow (Mr. E) who is suffering from combat induced PTSD, and I'm looking for a bit of guidance as to how to help support him. I've only recently met him, however he seems to be fairly comfortable with my wife and I, and has really poured his soul out to us in several lengthy conversations about his experiences and what he's dealing with on a day-to-day basis. We've never had any experience with this sort of trauma, however, and are trying our best to help without saying the wrong thing or doing something to betray his trust in us.
His main struggles seem to center around his fear that he is guilty of something and that someone is out to get/kill him, but he does not know what that something might be. He doesn't remember any specific events for which he should be in trouble, however he is having difficulty distinguishing which of his memories are real and which are most likely fabrications of his mind. He's talked at length about quite a number of different 'memories' that he has of meeting people he's never met before, being in fights with people he's never fought with, seeing things that seem imaginary, etc. He has even gone so far as to call nearly all of his prior acquaintances to ask them if they know of something bad he has done, but no one has confirmed his suspicions.
He has received professional psychiatric help in the past, as well as more recently, however he seems to be extremely suspicious of them. His main worry is that if he is to open up and talk about everything that they will turn him in for something he says to them. Again, he is worried that his guilt for some unknown event will come to light as part of his treatment, and his wife and kids will be taken from him and he will be punished as a result. I can't say for certain exactly what kind of treatment (and how often) he's been receiving, but as I said he's mentioned that he doesn't really trust the doctors he's been seeing.
He is 100% convinced that he has done something wrong, and he seems to mistrust anything or anyone which says otherwise. It almost seems as if he's desperately seeking something/someone, real or otherwise, to confirm the guilt he feels deep inside. For example, he was extremely upset the other day when another friend of ours got teary during the conversation, because he inferred that he must have known this person at some point in the past and that something he said reminded them of something bad he had done to them in the past.
I am very eager to try to help Mr E in whatever way I can, however I'm just not sure of the best way to do so. I've tried to encourage him to continue his sessions with his psychiatrists, but as I explained it seems as though he is not very open to their help. I know that I, as a friend, can hopefully help him get to a point where he feels he can trust the true professionals, but how do you go about doing that? How do you even begin to try to convince someone that you've only recently met that their doctor is not the enemy? Are there certain topics/ideas that I should try to talk to him about regarding this?
I am very willing to sit down with him and try to be understanding/supportive of what he's going through, however I'm always so afraid of saying the wrong thing or somehow betraying his trust in me. Should I avoid asking questions or making suggestions of what might help? Are there specific topics that I should avoid all together? Is just having someone who listens more important that someone who can help determine what's real or not?
Thank you for your wonderful community!
I've recently become friends with a fellow (Mr. E) who is suffering from combat induced PTSD, and I'm looking for a bit of guidance as to how to help support him. I've only recently met him, however he seems to be fairly comfortable with my wife and I, and has really poured his soul out to us in several lengthy conversations about his experiences and what he's dealing with on a day-to-day basis. We've never had any experience with this sort of trauma, however, and are trying our best to help without saying the wrong thing or doing something to betray his trust in us.
His main struggles seem to center around his fear that he is guilty of something and that someone is out to get/kill him, but he does not know what that something might be. He doesn't remember any specific events for which he should be in trouble, however he is having difficulty distinguishing which of his memories are real and which are most likely fabrications of his mind. He's talked at length about quite a number of different 'memories' that he has of meeting people he's never met before, being in fights with people he's never fought with, seeing things that seem imaginary, etc. He has even gone so far as to call nearly all of his prior acquaintances to ask them if they know of something bad he has done, but no one has confirmed his suspicions.
He has received professional psychiatric help in the past, as well as more recently, however he seems to be extremely suspicious of them. His main worry is that if he is to open up and talk about everything that they will turn him in for something he says to them. Again, he is worried that his guilt for some unknown event will come to light as part of his treatment, and his wife and kids will be taken from him and he will be punished as a result. I can't say for certain exactly what kind of treatment (and how often) he's been receiving, but as I said he's mentioned that he doesn't really trust the doctors he's been seeing.
He is 100% convinced that he has done something wrong, and he seems to mistrust anything or anyone which says otherwise. It almost seems as if he's desperately seeking something/someone, real or otherwise, to confirm the guilt he feels deep inside. For example, he was extremely upset the other day when another friend of ours got teary during the conversation, because he inferred that he must have known this person at some point in the past and that something he said reminded them of something bad he had done to them in the past.
I am very eager to try to help Mr E in whatever way I can, however I'm just not sure of the best way to do so. I've tried to encourage him to continue his sessions with his psychiatrists, but as I explained it seems as though he is not very open to their help. I know that I, as a friend, can hopefully help him get to a point where he feels he can trust the true professionals, but how do you go about doing that? How do you even begin to try to convince someone that you've only recently met that their doctor is not the enemy? Are there certain topics/ideas that I should try to talk to him about regarding this?
I am very willing to sit down with him and try to be understanding/supportive of what he's going through, however I'm always so afraid of saying the wrong thing or somehow betraying his trust in me. Should I avoid asking questions or making suggestions of what might help? Are there specific topics that I should avoid all together? Is just having someone who listens more important that someone who can help determine what's real or not?
Thank you for your wonderful community!
