Emerg Services Night Terrors And Cold Sweats ...

[AEM92]

I've seen alot more death and violence in my life than any person should. I'm not a combatant, but I've been shot at, injured sexually assulted, held my sister as she cried to sleep after being raped and watched friends die at the hands of my country's military and police. It's been 2 years since I've moved to London along with my sister (something I often feel guilty about because I got out where others haven't .. including my parents, my grandmother and a host of extended family), and I didnt think i had a problem. I thought I was OK having accepted that this is just a normal part of life in my country... Then I started to have intend nightmares... Sometimes I hurt myself in my sleep and I wake up with bruises and scratches ... I relive some of my worst memories in my dreams.... And I wake up drenched in sweat almost daily .... I'm now afraid to go to sleep and when I do sleep I wake up tired.... Sometimes I end up crying.

I tried to see a counselor at my university ..I am trying to go back to school and get my life together ... Least to say I ended up bursting into tears and not because I had a breakthrough ... But more out of genuine terror that I'm losing my mind and all I have for help is a woman suggesting I use "breathing exercises" or "talking to friends."

I don't really know what I expect... I'm just really tired.... And I feel incredibly alone and guilty... I miss my family.. I hate that I get to be here and complain about my mental health when they have nothing but uncertainty ..or certain violence ahead ... I feel guilty that many of my friends are now in jail or dead because my government decided that was fair, and I just got out when I could. Maybe even more guilty that I am terrified of going back again....

 

[Sea_lady]

Hi,
Have you tried Prazosin? My GP made me a prescription last time. I was having similar symptoms (cold sweat, nightmares, feeling even more tired, depressed and exhausted after I woke up...). I could not test the medication though because all the pharmacies near me did not have supplies, but it is normally not something hard to find.

I still have nightmares, but the ones I have now are not like those with the cold sweat. What did help me was to rewrite the dreams after I woke up. I was imagining the dream again, and changed its ending as I wanted. After some time, nightmares intensity has reduced. It is called 'Imagery Rehearsal Therapy' (IRT).

Do you take any meds? That helps. I could see a real difference since I started to take Setraline, for example - against anxiety.

It is an excellent thing that you are now back to school. Does anyone know at your University about your disability? Can you get any help? My University gives me a mentor to guide me. She helped a lot to ensure I can succeed my studies. If you are British, you can also have financial help: it is called 'DSA'.

Guilt is a feeling very common for those who suffer from PTSD. The lack of proper sleep may exacerbate it, and also make depression worse. However, these feelings are too often not justified. They feel real, but they usually are not. It is the PTSD that makes reality seems darker and more painful that it actually is. I started to feel better once I understood that I was not guilty of the abuses I suffered from (my abusers were!) and I have learnt to identify my true emotions, and dissociate them from those produced by PTSD. Don't give up.

 

[Sea_lady]

About the guilt... Many PTSD sufferers have what we call 'surviver guilt'. Feeling guilty for having survived when the others are dead, for example, or still in the Hell you have escaped. It is part of the disease.