No More Therapy

[Deleted member 10686]

I really liked this therapist. She's helped me a lot and this last year with her I have made some great progress, and now she's gone. She basically stretched herself to thin and doesn't have time for me anymore, being really unprofessional and canceling on me literally every week, or even having me wait 30 or more minutes for her to get there just to text and say that she is sick and can't make it. It's been a huge problem and today, when she cancelled on me again, I had to say enough is enough. She told me fine, she can't overextend herself anymore and that she hadn't been paid in quite a while (a non profit pays for my therapy) and that I should appreciate the extra time she gave me in sessions.

I can't believe that's what she had to say to me. Anyway, so I'm not seeing her anymore obviously. My therapist before her hurt me much more deeply when he left, that's a long story ..

So, you tell a therapist all of your problems and traumas and do all this intense work, then they... Abandon you. I don't want to be abandoned again, so I don't want to see any more therapists.

 

[Justmehere]

I'm so sorry. I can't help but wonder if the non-profit not diligently paying her might have fueled her to be way too lax about being reliable. It is SO critical to have therapist who is reliable and can be counted on to be there in an expected and regular fashion... I have been abandoned in various ways by several therapists. It was heartbreaking beyond words to experience. It's just horrible when the people who are there to help, that we risk so much with, end up hurting so bad. My heart goes out to you. It took a long time for me to try therapy again, but I eventually did. To be frank, I am waiting, just waiting, for this one to abandon me too. (So much that when she doesn't quit when things get tough or hard, I want to quit...)

I can't imagine trying to deal with a therapist who would be 30 minutes late, only to not even show up at all. That is so so so terrible! There is just no excuse for that. I think you made a good decision to leave her. I hope that in time, you might find the kind of support that will help you on your journey to heal, inside or outside of therapy.

((((hugs if you accept them))))

 

[Hashi]

forwardmotion, that's so awful. It's very unprofessional, and it also seems quite heartless to me. It sounds like the non-profit have acted very badly too

I think I'd be feeling the same way.

I can't help hoping for you that you can still find a reliable therapist at some point, but if I was in your shoes I probably wouldn't want to look again.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

*kicks your therapist in the shins* (I hope that made you laugh, even just a little...)

This therapist is INCREDIBLY unprofessional! My last therapist gave me similar crap about not getting paid in a timely manner, but duhhhhh, Medicare takes it's sweet time with payments and she knows that seeing as how she's been a provider for awhile now.

It's her responsibility to not overextend herself. If her practice was full, she had the responsibility to not take you on as a patient. Or, she could be one of the stupid ones who just keeps bringing new clients in, and you were the unlucky one who got the squeeze, maybe she decided to because the payments weren't coming fast enough?

Most therapists aren't like her. Don't let her dictate your healing. She doesn't deserve that power.

 

[The Albatross]

Okay so you've made a decision. What's next and how will you continue to improve? Not being pedantic, just what is your fall back position and what is your strategy moving forward?

 

[Barconian]

I can't help but wonder if the non-profit not diligently paying her might have fueled her to be way too lax about being reliable.

That's one answer :)

 

[Deleted member 10686]

For a while she was seeing me a second time a week for free, by her choice, also she said numerous times that she didn't care about getting paid, that she would see me for free. I don't even think she was billing the non profit the last few months. I don't think it's about money at all. She just used that at the end to be a bleep.

I just called the non profit to be set up with a new counselor.

 

[Justmehere]

She sounds really flaky! I think you are right that she used it as an excuse for her flakiness and lack if reliability. Ugh. That would feel so awful to me.

I'm really glad you are going to give it another try. I hope they find a really good one.

 

[Deleted member 10686]

Our text conversation ended not the way I wanted it to, (this conversation being the one I was talking about before) I really want to say something to her, about the ways she was unprofessional and betrayed me.... I really, really want to have a final chance to say what I need. Is this a bad idea?

 

[Justmehere]

If she has said, don't ever contact me again... then it's a bad idea. Otherwise it might be a good use of your voice and maybe a way to end on a better note. It could stir things up too, but it could also help give you a better feeling about ending. It might be feedback she listens to better now too. She may not at all listen to it, but if it helps you to communicate it, it might be worth the risk. Just my thoughts.

 

[Deleted member 10686]

I agree, I think I will be doing that.

The nonprofit said they don't have the funds to help me anymore. I don't want to shop around. I don't know if I should just quit.

 

[Deleted member 10686]

" Others who I cancelled on last Saturday said they were sending prayers. There are some who truly appreciate and understand that I have limitations. "

This was her response to me, when I said how I felt about her always being extremely late and canceling on me constantly.

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