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One Of Those Nights.

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ashdawn8287

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Well I can't sleep tonight. I'm out of my sleep medication and can't refill it until the 22nd. I can't see my psychiatrist until the semester starts in august and sometimes on bad nights I take 2 if the first one isn't putting me to sleep. So I run into an insurance problem for a couple days. I think I might switch medications when school starts. I feel good but I obviously need an adjustment or something else. I feel I could use a tiny push to feel a little better. I hate the constant worry and I've been on medication that helps that. Who knows.

So since I don't have my sleep medication I can't sleep so I'm experiencing the late night into early morning shift. Yesterday I only slept for 3 hours. I just don't want to sleep. I'm not really sure why. Everything has been good lately and I'm trying as best as I can to still get things done even on this schedule. I hate when its one of these nights. I realize you have to be resilient with this. I just hate not sleeping because I can really feel the toll it takes in my body when I don't sleep well.


These nights are lonely. My fiancée stayed up with me until about an hour ago. This time of the morning is depressing when you've been up all night and the sun starts coming out. Feels like a complete waste of a day because you are too tweaked out from exhaustion to even be productive so you do nothing because you have no energy but your mind won't SHUT UP enough for you to fall asleep. So you exhaustedly play with thoughts on you're head. Ugh I am just tired. I hate when my sleep is messed up.
 
I keep spacing out today. I'm pretty bored so that doesn't help. I might read here soon if I don't fall asleep. I'm not depressed or anything. I just can't turn my mind off. I guess I have been challenging the worries. I never stay focused with TV unless its extremely interesting. My mind just won't turn off and I'm scared to do too much because I don't want to be triggered. Talking about it helps, thanks for responding.
 
I try a nice shower when I go to bed. and I don't talk to any one. No computer or t.v. after 10:00 p.m.

Just balance in your life. That is my key. Hope this helps.
 
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