People Who Can't Get Over Their Ex

[Uja]

It sends me into anxiety attacks. It's my biggest issue with supporters on this site. I know we are responsible for our own triggers, and I am not asking anyone else to change. I just need to get it off my chest, hoping that can it help me cope better.

I want to clarify that in most cases, it is not people who have had a recent breakup unless they clearly state their ex has asked them to leave them alone and they admit to not being able to resist contacting them. I try to avoid those threads.

There has been a small handful of people on this site, that I started fearing were going to harm their ex. It probably isn't rational. Even if there was real cause for concern, what could I do about it? The problem is not so much what I am thinking, but what I am feeling when I come across those. It is worse when it is in chat.

Any other stalker victims have problems with worrying yourself into a panic that other women are being stalked? I am also PMS'ing bad today and maybe extra supper sensitive.

 

[Umi]

There has been an upswing in that type of supporter on here lately. It is frustrating. I don't think it's typical of our supporters usually.

 

[Uja]

Umi, I agree. I have been on the site for a few years, and I would say that it really started last december.

 

[Ahik]

The so-called "supporters" who come on here for the looooooove of their life :rolleyes: and then mid sob start flirting with sufferers, all the while talking about how wonderful they are as supporters while how much *pain* unbearable pain their sufferer is putting them through...

...Gross. Me. Out.

Just oozes predator.

And, ditto, is completely uncharacteristic of our totally badass core of supporters on site.

 

[Ekeke]

I find these posters really alarming as well. The worst part is, for the really intense ones, even if you try to explain that what they are doing borders on stalking, they immediately claim it's all out of love and the rest of us just don't understand how strong their love is. So sick. For anyone who has ever been stalked, this is the most nauseating way of thinking ... and yes, it's scary

 

[Capik]

It's made me pull back from posting here as much as Id like. I'm totally alarmed by it. As someone who struggles from multiple traumas that are as old...

Sorry, phone fail. Wiwu again. So many traumas of my own make me feel undermined when others claim great suffering from whatbis really just a breakup. I have no patience.

 

[Udoru]

It freaks me out too! And I have been stalked too - for a few years!!!
It's the furthest thing from love that I can think of to not accept anothers needs and wants. It scares me too when they start analysing why he/she doesn't want to see them and say it's because he/ she is unwell )-:
Argh!
Please respect the wants and needs of another. R-e-s-p-e-c-t!! And back off!!
Intimacy is fraught for most of us - suffered, supporters, the general population!
I do think some supporters get too caught up in their partners problems and don't even think about looking at their own.
PTSD doesn't make you an alien being!

 

[Nitaw]

That said, I also believe that many Of the supporters are in just plain old abusive relationships - nothing to do with PTSD - but because their partner has PTSD, they think maybe that's why.
No it's not.
again - people with PTSD are not alien beings! And it doesn't mean they're angels either!