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Relationship Possiblities & Answers

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Chrissy, I'm sorry that you didn't hear what you wanted to hear. It sounds as though you are desperately wanting to get a definite answer about where your relationship is headed, and that's not happening.

Unfortunately, PTSD is very much a day to day thing - committed relationship or not really. I'm married to a man who has PTSD and I love him to bits, but I still know that things will be up and down with him and I need to be prepared for that, have support in place for me, and look after myself the best way I can. This will help me, to help him too. I'm lucky that he is also getting the professional help that he needs and is doing absolutely all he can to address/manage his PTSD. I couldn't be more proud of him for that, as it has plagued him for such a long time.

I can tell how upset you are, BUT... he has been honest with you. For that, be grateful :) It could have been easy for him to become upset/agitated/angry that this had been brought up at all for any number of reasons. Alternatively, he could have led you into a situation where you felt there was more than what there was. These may seem like poor things to be grateful for, but in the scheme of how PTSD can (and often does) work, I think it is a good thing that he has been honest with you about what is going on with him right now.

That said, you need to look after yourself. Do what you need to do, for YOU to be ok. Whether that means moving on, or accepting that your role in his life is not what you had hoped it would be and taking a backseat for a while... I really don't know. It is a decision that only you can make.

I hope this has been useful - although I'm quite sure it's not what you would have liked to have heard - for that I apologise, but I'd hate to see you hurting any more than what you already are.

Look after yourself,

B x
 
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