Medical Post-heart Attack Emotional Fallout

[Kailani]

It may seem like he is depressed but it may actually be the body still recovering from the attack. I thought my grandfather was depressed too but he actually had congestive heart failure after a heart attack. He had to have weight checks every am cuz his lungs were filling with fluid and he was sleeping a lot which to me looked like depression. Part of the heart muscle may have died and so his energy may be low. He may also be having an acute stress reaction where he is overwhelmed with the processing of the near death experience and cannot tolerate too much stimulation like music. Hope you are taking care of your stress too! It's a lot to go through with diet changes, doctors appointments... Hot showers or baths, self care; some of your favorite things, people, activities.,. Hope you and he feel better!!!

 

[hodge]

Good point, Kailani. I do now think it's more of an emotional stress reaction than depression. Plus I hadn't thought of how his body's recovering could be impacting his emotions, but I bet they are -- thank you for your perspective. I remember when you were going through that with your grandfather. I hope you've recovered from that. At least I know you have to the extent that you could write this message :-).

We are both still pretty much just taking it easy. I took a nap today. Not putting any extra pressure on myself. I work part-time for my mom's homeless center and she knows I'm not ready to get back to work just yet. That's a blessing - no criticism from her.

I'm thinking of bringing our part-time dog over tomorrow. It may do us both good. He's such a sweetie. Plus it may be warm enough to take him swimming at the lake. He loves that.

 

[Neverthesame]

I can't tell you if you are projecting or not...

And, Friday beat me to it again... :O_o:
Well this will be a fair bit shorter than I originally anticipated. (I lied. I found something to ramble about) :tup:

I have met lots of people over the years who have had similar experiences to your husband. My favorite was a man who I worked with for several years.

Nicest man I ever met. I assumed that this was this was how he always was. One day on a coffee break he told me this was not always the case. (I had commented on how positive and calm he was, irregardless of the situation or how negative the people around him were.)

He was in his 60's when I knew him. He told me that when he was in his early 40's. He was running his own buisness, always stressed out, tired and cranky.

One evening be said he began having the worst heartburn he'd ever had. Like your husband, he tried antacids, didn't help. Then his arm went numb, so an ambulance ride later, he found himself in hospital recovering from a heart attack.

After he had begun to recover, he said it absolutely changed the way he felt about life. He sold his buisness, began working odd jobs for something to do, and a bit of cash. But spent his real effort on becoming a better husband and father. He loved going out hunting with his boy's and later grandson's.

This was about 15 years ago. He's still very much alive and still a very nice man.

I'm just glad your husband is ok. :)

 

[hodge]

Aacck. I just found out my therapist retired. I knew that was coming eventually. She's probably in her 70s. That's why I've had so many therapists over the last 10 years (three) -- I always chose an older woman, and, yeah, I'm in my early 50s, so guess what they do eventually? Anyway, I got a call from a woman at the clinic who left me a message while I was sleeping this morning who told me that and wanted to help line me up with another therapist. Evidently she got my email cause she said she understood I've got some stuff going on. I just called her back and left her a message. I know practically everyone here knows what a bitch it is to get a new therapist. They don't know you, you've got go through all your crap again with someone new so they are up to speed, ick. Oh, well. That's life. At least I hope they have another therapist who will come to our town once a week, because otherwise it's a 60-mile round trip which I can't do on my own, which would mean hubby would drive me. It would take about three hours out of our day, which isn't horrible, but I do hope at least there is a woman therapist who will now come out here. At this point I don't care how old she is. I just much prefer seeing a woman.

 

[hodge]

I did hear back from the clinic on Thursday and indeed it is a woman therapist who now comes out here on Mondays. I can't get in here till June 20th. I may make an appt. with her in the town 30 miles away before that, but since this coming Monday is a national holiday here and nothing can happen soon, I decided to sleep on it for a couple days.

My husband J. seems to be doing better emotionally. He's been listening to music since yesterday. He seems to be better able to read, though he has the pressure of having to write a book review next week. But he's been talking to me about it and told me he already has a good idea of what he will write, so that's more normal, which is excellent. He gave a mini-lecture last night on the subject, lol. Seems to be coming back to his old self little by little!

And dinner last night tasted good to him, which was great. But then we had roast beef (and I cut off the fatty parts), mashed potatoes (with the new low-sodium margarine), salad and corn on the cob - the last of which is one of his favorite foods. I also found some multigrain chips and lower-sodium salsa (Newman's Own, which I love only because he gives all the profits to charity). Oh, also got him a Dove dark chocolate bar for another treat. Dark chocolate is good for the heart, but I still have to do some research on the particulars and find out which dark chocolate is best. In the meantime, though, I figured one dark chocolate bar isn't going to hurt. I think if we do most things right most of the time, he can have a treat here and there. I mean, it took 69 years for him to get to this point. His heart is now in much better shape than it was, so we will follow the restrictions for the most part, but I think he can also have some treats once in awhile. I let him get a half-gallon of vanilla ice cream last night (though I did have some reservations about that). And he saw the doc here yesterday for his first follow-up lab tests and appt. and everything is fine!

Lol, also found a beer that is brewed with popcorn of all things. He loves popcorn as well as beer, so I got him a can. Our liquor store owner is a sweetie and she looked up sodium content in beer and it's extremely low (14 mg per 12 oz), plus no potassium, so he can have that, too. She's also my source for Sparkling Ice drinks. Non-alcoholic, lots of flavors (the Cherry Limeade is to die for), no calories and no aspartame (which gives me headaches), plus some amount of vitamins, minerals, and antioxidents. He really likes the Pink Grapefruit I've been getting him, so he gets the grapefruit flavor he likes without all the natural potassium in grapefruit. Yaay. And each 17 oz. bottle is only 99 cents. Cheaper than a soda.

I do feel kind of guilty in that I bought chicken breasts with bone and skin instead of the boneless skinless. But it was $4 versus $8 and got a lot more chicken for $4. I put them in the oven about an hour ago and will remove the skin. I'll make chicken sandwiches (on the whole wheat bread we always eat anyway) with lots of vegetables and avocado for dinner tonight. He really likes that.

 

[Deleted member 33052]

I'm so sorry to hear this news, hodge. I can't read all of the posts (feeling overwhelmed), but I just wanted to say that I was feeling the same way after my heart procedures. Therapy helped, although my depression is all mixed up with the PTSD, so I don't know where one starts and the other stops.

Understanding that you're potentially very near death allows you to see what matters. It sounds like his priorities are just right!

I hope he heals well, and quickly! :hug: my friend.

 

[ladee]

So happy to hear the great news @hodge !!! Wonderful that you were worried about him, but sounds like he is getting back to his old self, not as in 'age' old !!! And you are an awesome wife to pay so much attention to what he eats and drinks.... so you will both be all healthy and stuff and make me feel bad...:D
Not really, I eat descent considering...
Just very happy to hear such wonderful news... yay for both of you !! Lots of hugs..

 

[Deleted member 33052]

Hodge, let the poor guy have some fun with his food. Nothing but healthy stuff would make me want to die. :p

Everything in moderation, right?

 

[hodge]

Right, Mal :-).

 

[hodge]

Thank you, Ladee. Yes, he's definitely getting back to his old self a bit (and, yeah, not old as in age; he's a very young 69. No one can believe how old he is just by looking at him :-)).

Lol, some friends of ours sent a beautiful bouquet the other day and our eldest cat Robert kept knocking it over wherever we put it. Hubby put it up high on a shelf in his office and Robert just knocked it down again, so now it's in my office. I put it up on a high shelf, too. Hope he doesn't climb up there.

Don't feel bad! We all need treats sometimes!

 

[RussH]

My husband J. seems to be doing better emotionally. He's been listening to music since yesterday. He seems to be better able to read, though he has the pressure of having to write a book review next week. But he's been talking to me about it and told me he already has a good idea of what he will write, so that's more normal, which is excellent. He gave a mini-lecture last night on the subject, lol. Seems to be coming back to his old self little by little!

I am very glad to hear this!

 

[hodge]

Thank you, Russ. I'm very glad to be able to report that!