Ptsd as debilitating

[Deanna]

I don't understand what you are getting at....

She's saying that she changes her attitude and gets the job done. ( usually or most likely)

 

[The Albatross]

Yup exactly. Sometimes it's like wrestling an octopus... but hey... my mind, my octopus.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I guarantee when your friend brakes her ankle in your house, you'll start getting a few bills for it.

Nope, her free will. There isn't a contract and we pay her cash. As far as anyone knows she was visiting and had a broken ankle when she arrived.

Also, when your late grandfathers silk-tie goes messing or the handles on the tube are just gone.

I have zero worth taking and no one is EVER in my home alone. Or a room alone for that matter. Anything worth anything is locked in a hidden safe.

Really, in today's world, there are trustworthy people. I am learning that more and more in therapy. Protect yourself, yes, but thinking you cannot trust a long well known ex neighbor to clean your house when you are home? A bit much for me. And I trust no one generally.

There are cheaper alernatates was my point. You don't need to pay a pricey maid service or a costly nanny service. Family, a well know friend and/or friend of the family, someone can usually be found if you are willing and if you look hard enough (and do all of the super low cost - as in a dollar - checks. Yep, I do it on many). They can steal but if they were that sort of person they wouldn't be in my life, or house, to begin with. She is a young abled body single mom needing some cash. If you have riches around worth stealing then hire a maid service.

 

[I need to heal]

My husband and I got into a fight yesterday about my PTSD. He was saying how tired he was and was feel...

If it's any consolation you are doing amazing by having a husband & staying in your job.
I had recent trauma at work & a car accident that tipped me over the edge to finally a diagnosis of PTSD - in a way I could feel it coming, that urge to just check out, the sense again that I couldn't relate, wasn't feeling like I fitted in - mgmt had been keeping me down & obviously trying to push me out - they had meddled so badly it was the only way to fix what they had done - stupid me again wanted to hope I had it wrong - but if that was the case these people would have come forward - for which at no stage did they. It's a horrible feeling to know you've had your mind raped again. In my PTSD state, I even the question is this site genuine & real? Or has it just been created to use me again as a case study for the more they wish to extract of what I reveal.

 

[Deanna]

Really, in today's world, there are trustworthy people. I am learning that more and more in therapy. Protect yourself, yes, but thinking you cannot trust a long well known ex neighbor to clean your house when you are home? A bit much for me. And I trust no one generally.

There are cheaper alernatates was my point. You don't need to pay a pricey maid service or a costly nanny service. Family, a well know friend and/or friend of the family, someone can usually be found if you are willing and if you look hard enough (and do all of the super low cost - as in a dollar - checks. Yep, I do it on many). They can steal but if they were that sort of person they wouldn't be in my life, or house, to begin with. She is a young abled body single mom needing some cash. If you have riches around worth stealing then hire a maid service.

Businesses are businesses and individuals are individuals. It as nothing to do with you having PTSD, or no PTSD, hysteria or no hysteria. It does reflect on taxes and sales taxes. I don't think you speak as a representative for personal businesses, because you don't hire any... but a business has different code per the Federal and state government that go with them, as well as insurance. It's not about the "rich" and what they can or can't afford.

 

[The Albatross]

Really?? Fraud? @lostforgottensoul - "There isn't a contract and we pay her cash. As far as anyone knows she was visiting and had a broken ankle when she arrived."

 

[lostforgottensoul]

This is really off topic @The Albatross. It wasn't my point at all and it would NEVER happen as it is one girl that we know well and my eyes stay on her the entire time.

My point was, again, there are way less cheaper options in this world today. That is all I am saying on this off topic discussion.

 

[Deanna]

lostforgottensoul said: ↑

This is really off topic @The AlbatrossMy point was, again, there are way less cheaper options in this world today. That is all I am saying on this off topic discussion.

lostforgottensoul said: ↑

Really, in today's world

, there are trustworthy people...There are cheaper alernatates was my point...She is a young abled body single mom needing some cash. If you have riches around worth stealing then hire a maid service

No, you quoted me twice after I said "in today's world". First, I nailed you on not hiring a business ( that's before you realized you were talking to a business in this forum), then you were threatened by my business sense with taxes and that you were not paying for taxes is why you hired - WHOEVER , and then you were offended because my terminology of * in todays world* was interpreted as something that made you feel old, and then you nagged that this thread was off topic. You are the one the ruined the discussion. I might have PTSD but I am not stupid. ( IN TODAYS WORLD ) You are a person that hides under their PTSD.. so you don't have to be accountable. PTSD doesn't give you the right to be an ass.

 

[anthony]

I am warning all involved now, take bickering off the public forum or restrictions will occur.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@mrsmegan, I watch Vloggers, the wife has PTSD, and in the comments on youtube was some horribly mean comments (calling her lazy and other nasty things that put her into tears) so they took the time to explain. The dishes are the husband's "chore" because she hates dishes and with also having OCD, it's very hard for her to do them, and he doesn't mind doing them. He also vaccums for the same reason. Their room sometimes have clothes everywhere and laundry not folded and put away.

They also explained it this way; because of her PTSD, she needs a lot of downtime which can be alone time, sitting and watching tv, playing on your phone or the internet, etc. What most call lazy is PTSD taking it's toll on the mind and body. It is NOT being lazy. And PTSD can absoultly cause physical issues and that can cause you to not be able to do housework, depending. And you need much more downtime then the average person without PTSD. You need to do self care well before you do housework, because, without that amount of downtime and self care, your mental and physical abilties could go downhill rather getting better.

Would it be easier to explain it that way? I still think he needs to research PTSD to understand the issues PTSD can cause and that can help him understand that sometimes you just need to let the house go and take care of you.

My house is disgusting in my eyes. I normally keep a house very well but I had to let that go as today I just cannot do much housework. This why I hired help. And that is still an idea if in the budget. But the reason the vloggers didn't fight over this is because he understood PTSD as best as he can without having it himself and understood what it causes. After they had children they became minimalists as that is less they need to pickup and clean.

But, my point is, he needs to be educated (whether via research or a calm discussion with him) what PTSD can do to the mind and body that can keep you from doing housework and it is NOT because you are lazy. I remember I was talking in a thread here and I was stressing over some sort of housework and someone said "let that go, you need to concentrate on you right now! That is much more important!" And it is.

I do agree, though, that you guys weren't fighting fair. I do get very upset when people cannot understand why I cannot do much because both PTSD and pain are invisable, so I get the physical comparison. It just gets frustrating that most understand the visable but not the invisable, but I would take the route of explaining if he is open, even finding some resources yourself about the mental and physical challenges PTSD can cause and show it to him, if he is open. And I would certianly advise him the need of downtime more then most and self care being critical and if you don't get these things, you can be pulled downhill. Then, I would leave it at that and if he still does not understand at least this much then that is his problem.

 

[I need to heal]

Your response is real. I have never experienced anything like this it's absolute hell. For nearly 9 weeks now I have barely left the house, let alone my bedroom - moving too fast causes heart palpitation - I need everything really quiet & slow. Lights & the sun hurts my eyes, complete exhaustion yet doing nothing - from an outsider looking in - yes I would seem lazy, the hous is a mess, it's an effort to cook, my back aches constantly from my car accident, I have suicidal thoughts, I even told my girls if I can't find work this week - they will have to go live with their grandmother & I will be on the street. I can't seem to be able to pick up the phone or do what I need to do - I get lost in the process & then it becomes confusing & all too hard - so many triggers now - from cyberstalking - 'bounce back - I think were cops, fake profiles were mainly Couran & Dreamworld & hospital. I don't know who was hurting me or who was helping me. A psychologist/doctor/educator really messed with my head - they used me as a case study without my consent. - my body is tired from having the shakes all the time, I keep breaking down still - I think the mess make me worse not better. I've been researching where the food vans & homeless shelters are in preparation. I thought I could make it out of the Domestic violence & start over again, but it's too hard - there are always going to be people who want to bully & hurt you. Who use/abuse & take advantage of you - boundaries they say, or how our trust issues & pushing people away makes us narcissistic too? Am I? But it wasn't me breaking things, throwing things, threatening, verbally abusing, shaking, shoving, spitting in my face - in getting away it wasn't me who blocked access to accounts, who continued to harass by text/email, who sent abusive letters to my parents, who blocked every decision that would have allowed me my independence, that then required me to find the strength to stand up & fight, to then be cyberstalked too - & revictimised in the workplace by those who also saw 'gullible fool' - who took advantage of my vulnerability & again wore me down - but apparently that's my fault cause otherwise I'm just blaming them & they say they were trying to help. BUT - if you want to help someone you ask don't you? at work I would always go up to staff & say is everything ok? How are you managing? Can I help with something? - I wouldn't follow them on social media under a fake profile. So messed up & confused. So please don't follow me anymore, cause I have nothing left to give.

 

[Catcar]

PTSD is WORSE than cancer. I have had cancer three times. Stage 3 one of the times. My PTSD is so much worse.

My husband and I got into a fight yesterday about my PTSD. He was saying how tired he was and was feel...