Don't know if I even should post this, but I'm so confused.
I'm in a relationship that has been lasting for a little over a year now, and we now live together.
However, this has been quite a challenge lately, and I just need your advice/opinions/to complain.
I am now able to study 50% part time after being on full sick leave for about 2.5 years. I'm struggeling a lot with low energy, nerve problems, dissociation, dizziness, nausea, insomnia, poor concentration, anxiety, some depression and sometimes talking is even too hard (can't remember words, can't concentrate and just have nothing to give).
The mornings are especially difficult for me.
My boyfriend have a four year old child from a previous relationship that lives with us every two weeks.
I try to help the best I can, I spend a lot of time with him, fixing practical stuff, now and then I pick him up from Kindergarten and I am the one that cleans up the puke when he's sick, what he spills etc. I also do all the chores at home except for cooking (he brings dinner from work).
I can't always help cause a lot of the time he just wants his dad and only wants him to help him/bathe him etc.
He gets really overwhelmed when he had him and it takes a lot of energy. He has a full time job. He usually get easily stressed and it comes out as aggression or bad moods. It takes a toll on the relationship.
He would like for me to get up with his son in the morning (6 am) and take him to Kindergarten. Not every day, but 2-3 times a week.
My problem is that when I do that I get so tired, the little concentration I have is gone and it's really hard for me to get any studying done. It's hard as it is, but on those days it's almost impossible.
I have sleeping problems, and usually try to get a couple of hours rest after my boyfriend leaves for work at 6.30 so I can function better. When his son is here he often climbs into bed with us during the night and I end up getting pushed into the wall, so I have to go sleep on a mattress on the floor and usually I'm just not able to fall asleep (just to make things clear - I don't have a problem sleeping on a mattress, it's the fact that I'm not sleeping and/or wake up with a lot of pain that is the problem). I feel like a zombie on those days.
I took him to Kindergarten today and now after cleaning up around the house I feel dead.
We were just on a 2 week vacation and I gave it my all. I ended up getting sick and had to stay in bed several days, plus it took me almost 2 weeks before I started to feel normal again.
But it was still not enough for him, he just gets annoyed and angry because I get sick. He doesn't get it.
I think I need advice. What would you expect from your partner if you had children from a previous relationship?
I feel like I never can do things good enough, but I understand that it's hard to deal with someone who's sick all the time...
How do you guys with children and partners make it work? And how much understaning can one really expect? Sometimes he just tells me that I need to lose the victim mentality and stop being lazy. I don't know what to do.
Ok, this got quite long, sorry about that...
I'm in a relationship that has been lasting for a little over a year now, and we now live together.
However, this has been quite a challenge lately, and I just need your advice/opinions/to complain.
I am now able to study 50% part time after being on full sick leave for about 2.5 years. I'm struggeling a lot with low energy, nerve problems, dissociation, dizziness, nausea, insomnia, poor concentration, anxiety, some depression and sometimes talking is even too hard (can't remember words, can't concentrate and just have nothing to give).
The mornings are especially difficult for me.
My boyfriend have a four year old child from a previous relationship that lives with us every two weeks.
I try to help the best I can, I spend a lot of time with him, fixing practical stuff, now and then I pick him up from Kindergarten and I am the one that cleans up the puke when he's sick, what he spills etc. I also do all the chores at home except for cooking (he brings dinner from work).
I can't always help cause a lot of the time he just wants his dad and only wants him to help him/bathe him etc.
He gets really overwhelmed when he had him and it takes a lot of energy. He has a full time job. He usually get easily stressed and it comes out as aggression or bad moods. It takes a toll on the relationship.
He would like for me to get up with his son in the morning (6 am) and take him to Kindergarten. Not every day, but 2-3 times a week.
My problem is that when I do that I get so tired, the little concentration I have is gone and it's really hard for me to get any studying done. It's hard as it is, but on those days it's almost impossible.
I have sleeping problems, and usually try to get a couple of hours rest after my boyfriend leaves for work at 6.30 so I can function better. When his son is here he often climbs into bed with us during the night and I end up getting pushed into the wall, so I have to go sleep on a mattress on the floor and usually I'm just not able to fall asleep (just to make things clear - I don't have a problem sleeping on a mattress, it's the fact that I'm not sleeping and/or wake up with a lot of pain that is the problem). I feel like a zombie on those days.
I took him to Kindergarten today and now after cleaning up around the house I feel dead.
We were just on a 2 week vacation and I gave it my all. I ended up getting sick and had to stay in bed several days, plus it took me almost 2 weeks before I started to feel normal again.
But it was still not enough for him, he just gets annoyed and angry because I get sick. He doesn't get it.
I think I need advice. What would you expect from your partner if you had children from a previous relationship?
I feel like I never can do things good enough, but I understand that it's hard to deal with someone who's sick all the time...
How do you guys with children and partners make it work? And how much understaning can one really expect? Sometimes he just tells me that I need to lose the victim mentality and stop being lazy. I don't know what to do.
Ok, this got quite long, sorry about that...
