Ptsd, New Boyfriend, And Depression

[Tabbycat925]

So I was diagnosed with PTSD about 11 years ago and recently was introduced to more trauma via my ex fiance and so now I'm back at therapy but this time with a lovely MDD and Anxiety diagnosis as well.
Recently I've had the luxury of moving back in with the parental units 1&2 because I had a slight breakdown and allegedly tried to commit suicide. Honestly, it wasn't my finest hour. So it was either this or state hospital and I'm not going there again so I chose here. Problem is my parents are super controlling and I'm still pretty young so I want a life and can't have one while here.
I think I may have found THE ONE recently. Quite literally this guy is great. There's one huge issue....I can't seem to explain how severe my disorder can get. I mean I can barely say it to myself. Sometimes he can be really insensitive to things that happen. Example: recently (wednesday) my Emotional Support Animal passed away. He just blew it off like it wasn't even upsetting. I get that he doesn't understand the relationship but I can't seem to explain how isolated that made me feel.
This guy makes me really happy which is something I don't get much of....I don't want to emotionally disconnect from him because he can't understand my emotions...
How do you explain your PTSD and any other disorders to your partner? what's the best way to do so

 

[Silver.]

I find it hard to understand how anyone who cannot empathize with the loss of a pet (support animal or not) can be a good guy. PTSD or not, he shouldn't have to "get it" to give you support after losing your pet.
Aside from that, people who don't have PTSD will never quite get it, there is the PTSD cup explanation, which I cannot find right now (though many people have it and can link you to it), helps to explain our stress. There are some good books out there for PTSD couples and there is also couples therapy with a therapist who specializes in PTSD.
Take Care

 

[Tabbycat925]

I find it hard to understand how anyone who cannot empathize with the loss of a pet (support animal or...

He's never really had stability so this has caused him to never own a pet. He likes animals but he's not a pet owner and those are two different types of people. I've always had a really deep connection with all my pets same as such with my ESA so when he died it made me really numb which I would think seeing from his situation of 1. never dealing with any sort of mental condition or disorder he wouldn't understand and 2. I didn't look or sound distraught.
These are, yes, side effects of my lovely neurons not firing off correctly but I could see how it would get skewed. It does bother me that he thinks one day I'll just "get over it" and trust me there have been many a arguement over said words. I just don't honestly know how to get him on even a nearby level without bringing him to therapy with me. Alas he isn't currently close enough to go because he's currently in Illinois helping a family member but as soon as he gets back in a couple of weeks I'll be sure to drag him along with to the therapist and see if it helps. He really is a great guy. I'm a lot to handle and he deals with a lot when it comes to me. I did kind of slip the details of my condition when I met him and whoa and behold the first night we spent together I had night terrors.
I'm not trying to make excuses just allowing some of the blame be placed on me. I'm not really an open person to people who don't have my same disorder. I always feel like they treat me different after.

 

[Justmehere]

Recently I've had the luxury of moving back in with the parental units 1&2 because I had a slight breakdown and allegedly tried to commit Suicide. Honestly, it wasn't my finest hour. So it was either this or state hospital and I'm not going there again so I chose here. Problem is my parents are super controlling and I'm still pretty young so I want a life and can't have one while here.

I just don't honestly know how to get him on even a nearby level without bringing him to therapy with me. Alas he isn't currently close enough to go because he's currently in Illinois helping a family member but as soon as he gets back in a couple of weeks I'll be sure to drag him along with to the therapist and see if it helps. He really is a great guy. I'm a lot to handle and he deals with a lot when it comes to me.

I think working on a stable healthy living environment is the first task at hand. If your family is the only option then family therapy might be a great option to work out a way for you to have healthier independence and support.

I would advise against dragging anyone to therapy. It won't help if they don't want to go, and if they go even when they are not committed to changing themselves, they could end up using it as fuel against you, leaving you more destabilized and thus more dependent on a controlling living environment.

He's never really had stability so this has caused him to never own a pet. He likes animals but he's not a pet owner and those are two different types of people. I've always had a really deep connection with all my pets same as such with my ESA so when he died it made me really numb which I would think seeing from his situation of 1. never dealing with any sort of mental condition or disorder he wouldn't understand and 2. I didn't look or sound distraught.

These are, yes, side effects of my lovely neurons not firing off correctly but I could see how it would get skewed. It does bother me that he thinks one day I'll just "get over it" and trust me there have been many an argument over said words.

Numerous yellow flags here.

He's never had stability. You need stability.
He's not a pet person. Pets help you function (that's what an ESA is.)
On-going lack of empathy and ability to understand your pain and struggle, lack of effective treatment and more comprehensive professional supports for you.
He tells you to get over it, when if that would work, I'm sure you'd be over it by now.

You can't change him. Your therapist can't change him.

The only person you can change is you.

Setting up and keeping boundaries around his actions that are hurtful are a great first step. Remember, boundaries are not there to control other people, they are to change what we let into our lives or not.

He is the way he is. You and him have very different needs in terms of what makes you both happy in life.

I'm concerned that you don't have any healthy relationships in your life outside of perhaps with your therapist. I think your primary focus should be on gaining stability and building up a handful of good solid supportive friendships. Maybe through taking a class or two at a college or support groups or sports or hobby related meetups.