Relationship Ptsd Relationship

[Volley123]

Hi Everyone! Just looking for advice: I met this guy about a year and a half ago we hung out several times and always had a blast everything seemed to be going really great. After a few weeks we stopped talking and started again a few weeks after that and we were together nearly everyday he would stay at my place almost every night this went on for about a month. Then I didn't see or hear from him for two weeks and I broke it off and he or I would call or text every week or so to maybe try and work things out it never happened and he ended up moving out of state all communication ceased at that point which was some what of a relief until a month after he had been gone. Now about every 3 weeks almost on the dot I will get a text or a call saying how much he loves and misses me. I've traveled to see him and it's always special when we are together but as soon as I leave all of his feelings seem to disappear until he feels like communicating again and I jump to him. Is anyone else going through this or a similar situation? Some days I feel like it's seriously just a game to him because he knows I'll be here and other days I understand that he has a lot of underlying issues and I try to understand but he shuts me out so much that I'm not sure if I should continue.

Thank you for reading!

 

[Sighs]

Does he have an official diagnosis of PTSD?

 

[Volley123]

Does he have an official diagnosis of PTSD?

Not that I am aware of. He served in the Army for 8 years and has been on a couple tours overseas. I've had several conversations with his mother and she assures me that I'm not the only one he shuts out.

 

[Sighs]

If he has it, and its untreated, then its not going to get any better. In fact, if he gets a diagnosis and gets into therapy then it will probably get worse before it gets better.

Its entirely up to you whether you want to continue the relationship but don't stay because you think it will one day improve.

 

[Volley123]

If he has it, and its untreated, then its not going to get any better. In fact, if he gets a diagnosis an...

Thank you for your input.

 

[KwanYingirl]

My daughter had a relationship similar to yours. It never improved. He had an abusive father and was an artist. He just couldn't take life. He is living in Northern Maine painting. And I'm sure still suffering because he wouldn't talk to anyone about it. My daughter had a difficult time getting detached from him. He clung to her then would disappear. Over and over. Sometimes it's best to just walk a new road.

 

[Glara]

It's kind of like what I'm going through. We are long distance, known each other over 30 years. I haven't actually seen him since December. He was diagnosed with PTSD, he is very suicidal and signed himself out of a hospital in February. He broke it off in March but wanted to see me in May. Now he just checks in almost exactly every 4 weeks, but only to say he's alive. I'd block him if we didn't have such a long history but I can't do that. I am trying to move on. I dont know if things will ever change. It's hard. I've been sick with elevated cortisol. I've been through a battery of tests all summer and the cortisol has been very bad for me. This relationship may even be the cause or at least it may be making it much worse.

I'm sorry I have no advice. I can only speak for myself. Yes, I keep hoping he'll get better and come back, but it's been so long that I'm giving up. I'm plan to start dating again..