Question - PTSD Debate?

[cookie]

please tell me you're not saying that this will never go away. i need to know that it will someday be gone, and i will be me again. i already want to die, how do you go on if it's neveeer going away?my t tells me i am unusual in that i have a stable marriage(but its getting a little wobbly now) raised my children in a loving environment(how did i know how? i think because i raised my little brother from the time i was 10, and i loved him so much.) and hold a job(teaching) although my dr. is trying to get me to take a break for a few months. i am beginnning to wonder if i shouldn't find something else, i am afraid i will hurt the children's education. sometimes i think if this is true, maybe i don't really have it, but i meet almost all the symptoms and diagnosis is confirmed by 2 dr.s and 3 different t. no way out cookie

 

[Boo-Damphir]

Hey Cookie, just hang in there ok? It may feel like there is no way out but just by you coming here shows you are willing to dig and crawl your way out if necessary.

Sometimes the big picture is too overwhelming. I think one of the most vaulable things I learned from PTSD, and I actually can call it a gift of the disease - is the ability to appreciate the little moments in life.

Before, I was so busy I didn't notice the way strawberries tickle my tongue, or how normal that wonderful smell of coffee is in the morning.

Tomorrow, go outside and look at one leaf on a tree. Really look at it, notice the veins, the array of colors, it's texture, it's smell. Do you know how special you are? No one else in the entire world will see that same leaf at that exact time in it's life. There will never be another leaf like it; and YOU got to see it.

 

[piglet]

sometimes i think if this is true, maybe i don't really have it, but i meet almost all the symptoms and diagnosis is confirmed by 2 dr.s and 3 different t.

Cookie, the fact that you have a good marriage and family and you have held down a really challenging job is a testament to how strong you are. Maybe you have just reached a time in your life where you felt safe enough on some level that your brain has decided it's time to sort a few things out.

Maybe you don't have to stop teaching, but maybe a compromise and working part-time for a while might be an option? You need to check out your employer first though and see what their attitude is - trust me on that one!

It will get better, and as it does, you will start feeling positive again. I very much agree with Boo-D - take some time to look at the little things in life, break everything down into small steps that you can achieve bit by bit.

I would say "don't be so hard on yourself", but knowing my own habits, I don't really have a right to say it!! :redface:

Take care.

 

[anthony]

Cookie, you need to concentrate on your thinking styles, because your getting into the generalization thinking, which you need to get out of. Is the world going to explode? Maybe. Is an earthquake going to destroy the USA tomorrow? Maybe... hell, we can't worry about the future, we have to worry about now... right this moment, and what we can do to fix ourselves now, not tomorrow.

I like Boo's rendition... well said boo.