Quitting

[alienplantnapper]

I got a new therapist last week. The more he seemed to want me to talk, the more i realized that talking is going to make it worse, keep things open. I took trazadone that night for the first time and it wasa nightmare, and gave me nightmares. After waking up angry for half the day ..i decided mebbe i should get rid of the meds. All of them.They make me tired all the time, they numb the symptoms but they're still there. Don't feel like myself on them and i just want to be done with all of it. Therapy and the meds. Ive begun to half my doses and plan to take myself off of everything. I dunno if i will get worse when its all done, but i don't feel like its getting better other than im just sedated all the damn time and i don't want to live like that either. Any of you justvstop the "help" and be ok?

 

[Rumors]

No but I have thought about it. Not because my therapist is bad but bc I can't do it. I hear what you are saying about being foggy headed. I don't like that either. I cut my dose in half and that helped tremendously. Sorry you feel bad. Hang in there!

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

Any of you justvstop the "help"

Yes

and be ok?

No

I do feel a lot better off meds but stopping therapy was a BAD idea. What I should’ve done was probably find a different T. The one I had was inexperienced and f*cked me up. But maybe I needed a therapeutic break? I definitely got more out of therapy the second time round.

Just stopping meds and therapy at the same time seems like a recipe for disaster. Do you have another support system to fall back on instead of therapy?

 

[alienplantnapper]

Not really a support system..
I don't have any real plan. Either i can bury the demons again for however long.. And be myself for a while. .or maybe i become suicidal. The thing is..meds don't make even thoughts of suicide go away, they almost just make it seem a little easier to do but too tired all the time to act on it. I was able to kind of ignore most of the symptomsfor a few yrs no meds no therapy, lots of rebuilding myself, meditation and being alone..as in single. Only now, I'm in a relationship. So...
I dunno.
I dont know what comes after...
I just really don't want to deal with any of it anymore and i feel like keeping meds and therapy keep it all on my mind so if there's a chance i could bury it again that doesn't help.
I don't even know if I'm making sense to anyone.
Its just all of it is robbing me of who i am and my life and i dont want be ptsd, and i don't want to be remembered as the person all of it is turning me in to.

 

[Deleted member 541]

Stopping therapy IMO, is just plain stupid. Cutting your meds in half, might not be such a bad idea but you may feel some withdrawal symptoms too.

The thing with therapy...... Yes, you do feel worse. Why? Because you’re dragging up the shit that we’d like to just bury and forget about. But, that doesn’t work either.

The only way to get better with PTSD.... Is to do therapy. You have to rip your trauma apart. Each and every aspect of it. How it makes you feel, how it has affected you, how it made you feel when it happened, how it altered you as a person, how you feel about every part of it. Will it make you feel like shit??? Yup, I can guarantee you will feel like shit.... But, it also gets better after time.

You can’t bury PTSD, or forget that your trauma happened. It doesn’t work that way.

 

[Justmehere]

Avoidance is a symptom of PTSD.

 

[Freida]

It's true that sometimes therapy just sucks and all I want to do is run from it. It takes so much energy and guts to dig all this crap up, relive it and try to process it. But as the others have said - it's how you get better.

Think about having a really bad break to your arm that leaves a bone sticking out. You have to have surgery to get it back in place, then have stitches and a cast and physical therapy. Eventually the bone will heal, but it will be a painful process. Not going to therapy is like leaving the bone sticking out. You keep wondering why it hurts so badly but don't want to go thru the pain to fix it.

 

[EveHarrington]

It sounds like containment skills would really help you.