Read My Diary and Have Little To No Anxiety

[pandora]

Thanx Tude that was a really sweet thing to say.

 

[cherryblossom]

Pandora,
well done with all your hard work. It's great that you can see your progress, and share it with us. It's good to read about your success, and certainly gives me hope.

That was hard work. I know I am doing it. When I try to helpothers here or give advice...I think I make good points......so now I just have to continue to think better....if I pretend I am talking to someone else it seems easier. I was so down on myself and soooooo self loathing....my therapist told me to listen to myself now...pretend I am taking care of a patient or another person and then use that in my own life. I don't know why this seems to have helped but it does and has.

You do make good points and give sound advice. I like the idea of pretending you are talking to someone else. I am way harder on myself, than I ever would be to others. I someone had a similar story to mine, would I hate them, or blame them, or think they were broken? No way! I will have to try to adopt this method myself!
Thanks Pand, and well done. I hope you continue to go from strength to strength, and that your physical health improves.

 

[pandora]

It has been a year since this thread!

I can read my diary and feell not sick at all...from what I am reading anyway.

I see a definite progression in the way I am healing with stress and in my thought processes. i am sure there is a bit more to purge but I am dealing with all the issues...My GOD it has been two years here and therapy right along with that. At least I know I am trying! I never thought this was ever going to be able to learn to live with this disorder...it may not be perfect but I sure have healed.

I find I like writing in my diary to record my physical symptoms and to vent about everyday life....I do not feel so alone there. I do not know when and if I want to give that up..I enjoy the support and positive words and advice. Anyway just to let everyone know...I am proof..... writing the traumas out helps and makes this disorder more manageable.

 

[cragger65]

Pandora, what an amazing thread this has been to read. Thank you so much for bringing it back to the fore. Gives me so much hope for continuing. Thank you, thank you, thank you, and a BIG congratulations!!!

Dave

 

[midi]

Wow! Such anniversaries are great to celebrate!

 

[LosFrida]

:smile:That's wonderful Pandora. I'm happy for you.

Hope your back feels better soon.

 

[Tinyflame]

Dear pandora,

Congratulations on your hard work, perseverence, and progress!

AND..you are likely doing EVEN BETTER than the progress you can "see now", as you heal in (more) ways that you don't even realize yet.

Congratulations!!
XOX

 

[patrick]

Wow! A true success story. And an inspiring one, too. Thanks for bringing this thread back. Congratulations - I do hope to see you around in the future.

Pat

 

[pandora]

I am back here quite a bit but not as much as before. I am so glad that I have given hope to others but in reading my diary.....I really do not feel sick, try hard not to blame myself, record the good and bad days, vent on the bad days and take it one day at a time. It is so glad to hear that this has helped othrs...hard work does pay off.

I am not only dealing with PTSD but the back injury is really making it hard to keep my spirits up, I live and work with and autistic child that also has tourettes and e are moving in the near future (three months) So....I know I am healing as I have a lot to dbut there are positive changes. IMOo and I know that but I am more excited, worried too. I hope everyone else gets as much satisfaction out of purging in your diary as I have!

 

[pandora]

Sorry! Aslo everyone...thank you for your kind words. I have been here 2 years feb.....it has been very beneficial but with therapy...IMO...I have had CBT and continue with EMDR that has made a difference but this forum has made the biggest difference!

 

[dharmaBum]

Diary reviews and reflections over time

I recently reread a trauma diary I had kept when I was a teenager (I'm no mid30s). As in your case, I read it fairly objectively and have reread it several times since coming across it and before joining this forum. At first I was ashamed that I was spending time in my present life thinking about past torments and trauma, but now I see that being able to reexpose myself to those traumas and reflect on how saddened I am or disturbing that knowledge is in my current life is a way to measure and reduce the negative effects of PTSD in my today-world.

I came across the same journal 15 years ago and was nearly suicidal with the despair that it provoked and pledged never to read old journals again. I didn't even know I still had it- had moved several times. Now I am grateful that I have it because it shows me work that I have begun and can continue.