Reading Forum Increases Symptoms!

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Xbreed

Learning
I feel therapy comes in many different forms and from many different resources, be them good or bad, as we learn from both, And like anything if we don't take breaks away from every thing we take in, we tend to become congested therefore losing the ability to put things in perspective, effectively stagnating recovery!
 
I am new to this site and am currently in a healing crisis...meaning I am taking lots of rest, exercise and better diet while taking a break from therapy. After a re-traumatizing event and a ten day hospitalization to stabilize, it is just time to settle down and get right with mind/body and spirit. This thread is so accurate. For now, I am only going on threads that appeal to healthier well being and positive input and steering clear of diaries or others stories. I am not in a place to be helpful by sharing my experience either to myself or others. Taking a break from the CBT, EMDR DBT and the myriad of other therapies I have done over the past 15 years has proven to be beneficial, for now. I am hoping my mind and body will let me know when its time to get back to the next level of in depth work that has helped me in varying ways over the years.

I try to limit my exposure to the site to about 10 minutes per day. I hope to one day be able to share more of my experience, but for now I am staying in the day and practicing using all the methods I have learned along the way.

Thank you to all who prepare, staff and monitor this site. I no longer feel alone on this journey of healing....
 
@anthony Currently many attempt to control their Link Removed with avoidance, substance abuse, work-aholism, etc etc…any key distraction method to not deal with the past pain. The problem is, the symptoms are still coming back and back, and each time more often with more intensity. This is your body progressively telling you that you need to face this fear; whether slowly or quickly, you need to face it.

What you say is so true for me. When I face my fear, i always feel beter afterward (not directly at the moment), is builds up my selfesteem!
If I avoid fear, is feel depressed, guilty and it lowers my selfesteem!
Exposure to personal fearfull situations (for me mostly social), is detrimental in my recovery.
And when i rumminate a lot or am obsessed about my personal trauma, it doesn't help me.
 

KwanYingirl

MyPTSD Pro
Exposure therapy during therapy sessions usually end with me dissociative. Since ive been a part of this community, I am increasingly able to tolerate distress, thus not resorting to checking out. I think you're right on @anthony. It's much better to take a break, maybe just read things under accomplishments. As an HSP I am careful to getting overstimulated. It's not useful to be told that. It's important to be self aware and live an informed life. I'm not here to perpetuate my despair but to learn skills I can learn to climb out of the mayo jar-not keeping sliding back down. And time away is my chance to reflect and identify with fellow PTSDers.
 

Tanishq

MyPTSD Pro
Over last 3 years I learned this.

Read forum + make discussions + put the work in offline life = Works!

I have spent 3 years here, so now I am spending lot less time here, but spending more time in offline to work out things. I found I am making so mistakes. Such as trying to handle all symptoms all at once and then wondering why my coping tools are not working. LOL.

Now pick one issue, try to deal with it at a time. Thanks to anthony for suggesting this somewhere on forum threads. I am sorry I can't recall that thread now.
 

lostforgottensoul

MyPTSD Pro
Link Removed

I want to extend the overall benefit of what reading and posting on any communit...

Anthony, there might come a time where I need a break but at the moment this is my ONLY support system if you will. Ive never ever found diaries or journals helpful due to no one reading them. I tried to write out my entire story from beginning to end but ended up cutting when my body had a reaction to the memories of my step father and I had to "punish" myself for it. I was emailing a local pastor but that ended very badly and so I started to write stuff and read it to my therapist but that still wasnt doing it then he sent me here and this has been my "safe place", my "venting spot", no one knows me so i can empty all the secerts that only my therapist knows and get insight and what not. My therapist's last session he did ask if i had read other's introductions and tho i have read a few, thats my weak spot. I have re-read my own but if others are too close to mine, who's would be close to mine other than the house in Clevland or Jaycee Dugard? But anyway, some do spark a not so good need to cut so i stop there when i feel that. What i need to do is stop reading and posting at work, not just because its causing me to be late for breaks lol, but I have almost different identities though not DID that come out at certian times of the day, at work is "the mask" and all emotions prwtty much numbed away and pushed down. At night "the little girl" comes out, thats when all the emotions are felt, when the anger and rage turns to pain, fear, terror, lonliness, hurt, sadness etc so thats when i SHOULD write so thats what i need to work on. Maybe later i may step away but when this is tour only support thats hard and not had much to process yet
 

lostforgottensoul

MyPTSD Pro
I am limiting my time on the forum recently due to self care desires and I find that when I overspend time...

Been here longer than me i guess. Ive only been here like a week and i have found it almost like a deep breath, especially after i told my story and didnt get like "OMG" reactions, or "thats unbelievable, too much to be believable" that what i normally get. Though most of the replies iny intro were about art as im an artist, thats ok. I think most people dont know what to say and again ok; its the lack of negitive that i normally get that helped. Also being here makes me want to share more, instead of keeping it inside and im wanting to get to a place where im coming here first before cutting. I started cutting more when I stopped huffing duster (about a yr now), but where i cut i hadnt cut there for yrs and i started cutting down there again a few yrs ago but more duing the last yr and that makes the cutting almost twice as worse. So anyway, i hope i get to a place where i need a break or decide i need to do self care first and feel drained here cuz that means im getting better but right now its like i FINALLY have people that understand to talk to!. I can write out all the bad stuff, all the hurts and fears and no one is gonna say "I cant believe that happened" or "i cant believe your mom would do that" as my dad says. Well she and both of them did and people here believes me and that very much helps. Im also dealing with 3 diagnosed mental disorders and 1 possible, its hard and ive found writing helps a lot but for some reason only when some one else can read it and i have no friends, no family, no one i can call or text so this is that for me. Im rambling, im sorry...
 

Jemini

Policy Enforcement
I'm halfway through reading this whole thread, after rereading the original article. Finding it very helpful.

Exposure therapy has various methods in which to improve your overall long term gain to your symptoms, this forum being a lower scale of direct trauma exposure therapy. Basically though, your short term pain from exposure to your fears here at lower intensity, is only to improve your long term gain with symptom control.

I am realizing that posting and reading on the forums is one form of exposure, while my fears from online stalking is another thing I am exposing myself to by being here. Also a reason for spending more time in chat, as it felt less exposed. Unfortunately that exposure quickly felt not safe thanks to MB, and I've been having much increased symptoms. This article helps me better see why that is.

I understand that you may be telling yourself and believing you need to be dependent upon this board, or even your counsellor who you may have on speed dial, but a counsellor will tell you the same thing: that you need time to process, analyse and reflect upon what you have learnt.

Likewise this helps me see why I do need more of a break. And is reassuring too -- when really symptomatic, for me at least, I can forget that I haven't always been in this place and don't need to stay in it.

Your brain removes its wall of denial, suppression, secrets even, and begins to release the negative emotional components within

This. Stuff trying to suppress pouring out. This all makes so much sense. I think I will try to spend time reading more about symptoms and management if I'm on the site. I don't think now is a good time to keep trying to journal about the traumas either.
 
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