Reasons For Being Afraid

[Panda Bear]

Shame.....

And that he'll hate me, tell me to go away.

Rejection.

 

[amosmorris]

Fears: she will pity me for my weakness, for buying into my own selfishness/self pity. At the same time I fear I'll be overwhelmed and overwhelming, and she won't know how to help me. I'll have put her in a weird and uncomfortable position--how can she comfort me when I'm too much? I imagine her feeling repulsed by me, unable to touch me or console me. At this point I feel like I'll want to just disappear , get out of her office, crawl in a little cave somewhere and hide. So...needless to say I've had a hard time "getting at the feelings" with her. I've had moments, but can't sustain them because of all this fear.

 

[Naoru]

I identify so closely with many things already mentioned.

Weakness
Imperfection
Shame
Rejection
Pity
Compassion
Trouble/Punishment
Fraud
Feelings
Overwhelm
Reliving
The Unknown

Plus just flat not wanting to talk about it.

That said, what I have shared? She has consistently given amazing responses and has helped curb many of these fears right away.

 

[Rumors]

Gosh, I can connect with so many of these same feelings. I just know my t will tell me to go away. i am so accustomed to my relationships being conditional. I either have to behave or perform in a manner that fits the need of the other person or they withhold love or leave me.... In my mind if anyone found out about my history, they will leave me. Period. Why wouldn't they? I am disgusting in so many ways.... Anyway, that's my fear.

 

[Snowflake]

Gosh, I can connect with so many of these same feelings. I just know my t will tell me to go away. i am...

Mine too

 

[Deleted member 34328]

Shame
Embarrassed

Don't want to put into words events that are too horrible. They're awful words.
I don't want to hear them, write them or verbalize them - even though I know my T would only validate and support me.

 

[Rumors]

Mine too

Sending support your way...

 

[Lee2001]

Oh Geeze good question! I am afraid of T not believing me, feeling shame, guilt, not being able to handle my emotions, coping in a bad way, and remembering more! I am afraid of feeling worse and symptoms increasing. But I am more afraid of not getting better for my husband and two little girls.

 

[Snowflake]

My therapist says the adult me needs to reassure the little girl with all these feelings that it will be okay this time. Ugh-

 

[NightSky]

My T always asks me think of my own young children when I feel shame. Because if it happened to them of course it wouldn't be their fault, make them disgusting, etc. I think that constant redirection of thought can be helpful. Except for when it makes me feel like I'm making everything up because I can't wrap my head around it ever happening to my children at their ages. Or me. It doesn't feel real. But ultimately voicing all of that with my T has helped me get more and more of it out. It's slow. And difficult. But we need people who will call out the lies for what they are (like we deserve shame, etc)

 

[Snowflake]

My T always asks me think of my own young children when I feel shame. Because if it happened to them o...

Yep-I do feel like I am making it up (actuallly my inner child is)

 

[katz]

Whether it's you or your inner child-(or any other parts)why are you or have you been afraid to share...

I worry about "grossing" them out. Or hearing them tell me that it is "disgusting". Then I would not want to share with them any more. I would blame myself for "hurting" them.