I'll do my best to explain this. So, I've been best friends with someone for the past two years or so. We used to hardly go a day without talking/texting/snap chatting. We have lived together for short periods of time and we did a lot together. However, things blew up with my now former job around a month ago, where she used to work too. She's still really close friends with the people involved.
Ever since, I have barely heard from her. I have made a point to not bring up work. She texted me asking if I was mad at her, which I'm not. But, when I text her, she pretty much never responds. Every once in a while she will message something about herself and then gets upset if I don't respond quickly. When we do spend time together, she spends most of it on her phone or computer instead of interacting with me. I'm just confused. I've tried talking to her about it, but she is very touchy about it and basically shut down saying I'm judging her. It didn't used to be like this. I know that relationships have their ups and downs, I just don't know how to read/manage that.
Even things that should be about me don't seem important to her. I turned 21 a few weeks ago and she completely forgot (meanwhile she is asking for $90 concert tickets for her birthday a few months away). It is just starting to feel very one sided. I don't make a lot of things about myself, and for the most part that it ok. I'm going through a rough time, and I don't expect/want her to deal with that. But, I do need to have a friend to go get a hug from sometimes, or to just go out and do something with.
I guess what I am asking is how to approach this. Do I just give it time/space? Do I talk to her? How should I approach that? I've never had a close friend before. I've never had rough patches before, in the past people have just disappeared. I guess it is a good sign that she hasn't disappeared? She is well meaning, but oblivious, and I am trying to learn how to react to that. I'd imagine she doesn't know how to approach this either (which is probably making the situation worse on both ends). I'm just afraid that if I give it too much space or try to talk about it too soon that I will blow it up.
Ever since, I have barely heard from her. I have made a point to not bring up work. She texted me asking if I was mad at her, which I'm not. But, when I text her, she pretty much never responds. Every once in a while she will message something about herself and then gets upset if I don't respond quickly. When we do spend time together, she spends most of it on her phone or computer instead of interacting with me. I'm just confused. I've tried talking to her about it, but she is very touchy about it and basically shut down saying I'm judging her. It didn't used to be like this. I know that relationships have their ups and downs, I just don't know how to read/manage that.
Even things that should be about me don't seem important to her. I turned 21 a few weeks ago and she completely forgot (meanwhile she is asking for $90 concert tickets for her birthday a few months away). It is just starting to feel very one sided. I don't make a lot of things about myself, and for the most part that it ok. I'm going through a rough time, and I don't expect/want her to deal with that. But, I do need to have a friend to go get a hug from sometimes, or to just go out and do something with.
I guess what I am asking is how to approach this. Do I just give it time/space? Do I talk to her? How should I approach that? I've never had a close friend before. I've never had rough patches before, in the past people have just disappeared. I guess it is a good sign that she hasn't disappeared? She is well meaning, but oblivious, and I am trying to learn how to react to that. I'd imagine she doesn't know how to approach this either (which is probably making the situation worse on both ends). I'm just afraid that if I give it too much space or try to talk about it too soon that I will blow it up.
