I am just sad today. It is 2:00 pm and I am still in bed. I cannot bring myself to function. My...
@Copper Princess yes, understand you are also sad today. There is no sun shining here in Lexington, KY and overcast, and I forced myself to wash dishes. I have dishwasher, yet I do not run - so expensive. After washing dishes, washing my face was next then brushing my teeth. I have not made it to taking shower, yet. Dealing with depression for me is difficult and yet I only try to keep moving, going, one second at a time and one minute, when I feel down and I am alone. I live alone and after I complete EMDR I want to try and meet special someone (man). Yet, I am knee deep in EMDR Therapy recovery, and timing is not good for meeting special someone.
Yesterday went to fitness and health center - has yoga, zumba, fully equipped weight room with trainer for assistance; writing class, sewing, billiards, ping pong, so much more, etc. So much activity. I did NOT want to go; forced myself. And although I was uncomfortable (putting it mildly) I managed to make it through a.m. and early p.m. Went to weight room, then writing class, then lunch. You
@Copper Princess making it from the bed to the couch is an accomplishment. Yes, baby steps.
Today, I don't want to walk (exercise), etc. Couch now since doing dishes and washing face. Found out yesterday after coming home from center that someone I love very much died yesterday morning. She could play piano like Liberace. She's gone now. Can't believe it. It is good that you have your daughter there with you. What I do and this is my way of making it through a very sad (depression for me) day is again small steps. And allow yourself to lie on the couch and feel as you feel. Do you like music? I play music ocean, rain, piano with ocean, CD's to help soothe when I am in sad/depression. I watch movies (DVD); I call someone significant and talk when I really need to share how I am feeling, as yesterday.
I would not allow much self-soothing and self-love prior to diagnoses in 3/2012 w/ pro. comp. ptsd. and maj. dep. disorder, and then only a little. Now, I understand through this forum that many members here struggle with sad and depression, all types of ptsd symptom. So now I am learning how to not only allow myself to self-soothe and cuddle up on bed/couch with warm furry coverlet, I also do not have the ridiculous guilt I use to beat myself up with because I could not be an *adult*. For me now in recovery from trauma, being an *adult* with pro. comp. ptsd is indeed lying in bed/couch for as long as I need and am able too without life infringements and obligations. Is this part of your ptsd or has something recently occurred in your life that has added to part of your overall ptsd sadness. I care. Jade
