- Thread starter
- #25
Sadielady3
MyPTSD Pro
Today was the IOP group. It was pretty good I guess, not as amazing as last week. I asked the question this week of how to keep going with therapy when it's getting hard. According to Google, it's common for people to want to quit when it gets hard so I thought maybe someone else would have been through it and had tips for getting through. This ended up as a conversation with how to hold yourself accountable. I know it was the only reasonable answer to give. I guess I've known all along that the feelings are just something I have to weather. And it all comes down to whether or not I'm willing to make that level of commitment to myself. I honestly don't know. I don't know if I'm worth it. And it's this belief right here that keeps me in fear mode.
Before group tonight I was telling my friend that I still wanted to quit therapy. She made me tell her when my appointments are and put them in her phone. She told me that if I don't go, she'll drive up and kick my butt. I'm definitely more afraid of angry L than I am of my therapist. She is a formidable woman...
I feel pathetic in a way to need support with something that most would consider basic adulting. I'm just about 40 years old- shouldn't I just be able to do the thing I need to do at this point? Suck it up and be an adult? It's a little bit humiliating and definitely humbling. Just like my students who have goals and supports in certain areas that they are not performing at age level, I guess I just need that right now. Something in my brain isn't correct and until I can learn that skill or adapt to become more independent, I just need that support. And if I'm being 100% honest, I think in L's case specifically, she'd rather have something like that to actually do to help me than to just listen all the time.
Before group tonight I was telling my friend that I still wanted to quit therapy. She made me tell her when my appointments are and put them in her phone. She told me that if I don't go, she'll drive up and kick my butt. I'm definitely more afraid of angry L than I am of my therapist. She is a formidable woman...
I feel pathetic in a way to need support with something that most would consider basic adulting. I'm just about 40 years old- shouldn't I just be able to do the thing I need to do at this point? Suck it up and be an adult? It's a little bit humiliating and definitely humbling. Just like my students who have goals and supports in certain areas that they are not performing at age level, I guess I just need that right now. Something in my brain isn't correct and until I can learn that skill or adapt to become more independent, I just need that support. And if I'm being 100% honest, I think in L's case specifically, she'd rather have something like that to actually do to help me than to just listen all the time.