Seeking some positive quotes/thoughts

[Underdog]

As some of you know, it's really been a rough past few months with symptoms in full swing. I've had to stop volunteering and am just barely able to function.

A long time ago, I took a positivity workshop. One thing recommended was sort of a meditation and mental retraining technique where you post a positive statement you want to believe in and feel about yourself on the mirror, fridge or other well-traveled spot. Every time you see the statement/quote, you speak it out loud 10 times in a tone as if you really believe it.

What would your quote be? I'm drawing blanks given where I am at and could really use some positive thoughts.

 

[Bookoffee]

I have always liked Helen Keller's quotes. This one is my favorite:

“For, after all, every one who wishes to gain true knowledge must climb the Hill Difficulty alone, and since there is no royal road to the summit, I must zigzag it in my own way. I slip back many times, I fall, I stand still, I run against the edge of hidden obstacles, I lose my temper and find it again and keep it better, I trudge on, I gain a little, I feel encouraged, I get more eager and climb higher and begin to see the widening horizon. Every struggle is a victory. One more effort and I reach the luminous cloud, the blue depths of the sky, the uplands of my desire.”

 

[Recovery4Me]

Wonderful thread! I love positive quotes.

"I am more than the sum total of what others have done to me." Coda.org

"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself." Eleanor Roosevelt

"We can not solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them." Albert Einstein

 

[Recovery4Me]

"A kite can not rise without the winds of adversity." paraphrase from quote below used on a success poster at campus

“UNLESS THERE IS OPPOSING WIND A KITE CANNOT RISE.”
Chinese Proverb

 

[Underdog]

Thank you both! True words!!! I love those!

What about positive self-esteem statements? I'm still drawing a blank on these. The goal is to find where you want to be and what you wish to accomplish internally, minus any use of negative language (implied, literal or otherwise). What positive self-help would you give yourself to transform over time your own internal being/issues?

Today was better, but still shaking and dissaciationg. Numb with no feelings. I'm finding that looking for these statements is near impossible. I know the power of using them and want to again, but everything I write has negatives or negative associations to the word choices.

 

[Recovery4Me]

@Underdog for me the trick is to slowly use cognitive reframe, not spend the energy in denying my negative. My negative inner voice must be heard for a little bit as it is part of me. Then once acknowledged, it dissipates a little as if contented and I place it on the back burner and move forward in positive thinking.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_reframing

Self Esteem offer- (for when I do not accomplish building Rome in a day):

My progress is not a race but a journey: I am more than enough in this moment.

*Consider self esteem statements starting with " Just for today_____" or "In this moment_____"
This technique (for me) slows down the inner critic and allows my positive to grow combat boots.

Example:
Just for today, I will trust in my progress.

 

[ghotiff]

I have read (and agree with) that positive affirmations that you don't believe are more harmful than helpful.

Just like @Recovery4Me stated, slow reframing is best.

The difference is
Not - I am happy
Instead - I am on a journey towards happiness.
Or - I am looking forward to finding a moment of happiness in today.

I am also a fan of gratitude boards / accomplishment boards and dream boards. They are boards that you put visual images representing things. Eg the putting the business card from your T on your board because you are proud of the work you are doing, or proud to show up to every session.

 

[Underdog]

Wonderful thoughts! Thank you both!

Honestly, the acknowledgement is part of the issue for me indeed. I hadn't even considered the fact that by not naming the beast in those self help statements that it was ignoring the issues and potentially making things worse. I spoke to my therapist about this two weeks ago and she kept correcting me because everything I said held negatives. Thanks to you both, I now see the bigger picture involved.

 

[Recovery4Me]

@ghotiff Thank you for expanding my horizons! I love the visual representation idea and will endeavor to build one.
When you post, I really learn a lot, so I am grateful for your shares.


@Underdog

I spoke to my therapist about this two weeks ago and she kept correcting me because everything I said held negatives.

Does your T 'sandwich' the correction? Like positive statement-negative statement- positive wrap? Or does she offer a reframe example from your take with a supportive wrap? If you are not sure and you are left with negative feeling feedback...one whom pays might consider asking for examples from the authority...just for that session.

It is was an awkward realization for me when I found out that with one T, (for more than a few sessions) he didn't really listen to the words but listened to the pattern, tonal quality and intensity to cue in harder or rest. However, I took that experience in stride and held it in knowledge that if someone isn't listening to my exact words, that my body language and tonal infliction also offers a message. That is when I requested he work with me also on positive reframe by rephrasing. I saw it as guidance, a personal tutor if you will not as an validation or discredit on where I was coming from as we are all unique.

Affirmation rewrap:
In this moment my life is better, I give myself permission to learn from my mistakes and not repeat them. *paraphrase from a 12 step

 

[ghotiff]

@Recovery4Me thanks so much for your kind words.

 

[Underdog]

@Recovery4Me , I think right now we are focusing more on the supportive wrap scenarios. The self blame and even hatred is very strong inside of me after being left with a sense of failure and hopelessness. I sincerely understand the need to acknowledge where I am today, but she challenged me to find statements not using negative terms describing myself and where I am, then finding positive ways to state where I want to be in relation to where I used to be.

For example, I said something like: "I don't want to live with self anger anymore and want to believe I have the strength and courage to get my life back to what it was before the trauma." The "don't" was a negative and she encouraged me to find other ways of stating "getting my life back to what it was before the trauma". While acknowledgment was fine, she felt that phrase would leave me sensing more of the trauma than the positive.

I'm still struggling to find phrasings that would be suitable, but what you both wrote helped me tremendously understanding the construction and have given me some great examples to think about and maybe use.

 

[Recovery4Me]

@Underdog ...honored to hear your take. Let us know what works (if you wish) along the journey -as I wish to grow & learn better techniques as well. :tup: