Self Confidence And Work

[shimmerz]

I loved my work. Loved it. Can't go back to it. It required absolutely no brain fog what.so.ever. No room for errors. I think that I am ready to at least even 'pretend' that I am going back to work. What I mean by pretend is to take something I love and work with it as if it could be a business for me. My self confidence sucks though. Completely.

Has anyone worked their way through this one?

 

[Underdog]

Yup, I feel that way too. I want to just pretend but then I find my volunteer duties as minimal as they are overwhelming at times. Luckily a mistake here or there doesn't spell the end of me with this small organization.

 

[Deleted member 28740]

@shimmerz Pulled those whirling thoughts in my head into coherence. Thanks :):hug::hug::hug::hug:

 

[shimmerz]

Oh boy.....this one gets me you know.

I find my volunteer duties as minimal as they are overwhelming at times.

This is what I am feeling too. But I think part of the overwhelm is 'I can't do this'. Bad tape. Wish I could get a grip on it.

Pulled those whirling thoughts in my head into coherence.

Whirling thoughts is right Change. I keep saying 'I can do this, I can do this'. Foccccuuuuussssss! Arrghhh!

 

[Ronin]

For me the question isn't as much about doing the things I was good at and loved, but incorporating what I learned doing them into new activities. Eventually, finding out what new I'm good at, and then some times a long line of head desking about why this or that won't go (either because outside circumstances or more often, my body / how I simply can't force myself to not act/think). In all of the meantime, Change is good for a mantra. And sharing, makes adjusting easier. Not that it's particularly easy to share.

 

[shimmerz]

finding out what new I'm good at,

This part is definitely throwing me off. I feel like I have no idea - no frame of reference as to what I am good at anymore.

 

[Ronin]

I'd start with what you like doing, what you have ideas how to be doing, and where you can be doing that in current conditions.

 

[Anarchy]

That "I'm not ready yet" is a little bar steward.

It was really getting me, but five weeks into my first proper job for five years and I'm loving it.

I'm really having to keep mindful and keep pulling myself back when I catch myself being avoidant or self distracting.

I'm actually finding the having to: go to bed at sensible times, get washed, and organize clean presentable clothes and getting up at decent times - very helpful.

I actually found the last two weekends, far more difficult than the week days.

My advice to the myself of two months ago would be "don't over think it"

You are not that me, so I'm not saying that to you, but, what I will say for you is:
What ever works for you, go for it:)

________________________________________________
update;
perhaps I'm more willing to show respect to my employer than I am willing to show respect to myself?

 

[shimmerz]

into my first proper job for five years and I'm loving it.

So very helpful. Thank you Anarchy. :hug:

 

[ghotiff]

Do you have goals for a job. For example, do you want to earn a small amount of cash, do you want to earn a standard type working income. Do you want something flexible, or something reliable?

For some reason I want to say to start small. Get used to being worth being given money again etc. eg get a regular gig walking someone's dog, just once a week. I don't know where this thought is coming from, so I could be way off.

 

[shimmerz]

get a regular gig walking someone's dog, just once a week. I don't know where this thought is coming from, so I could be way off.

I think it is the 'comfort level' more than the money for now that I am thinking about. The easing in. These are really good questions in helping me zero in on this. I really need to be careful of the expectations and stress. This dog walking thing would be a good plan. Interesting you should talk about dogs ghotiff. Dogs have been coming up all over the place in posts and things going on in life these days. Funny....

 

[The Albatross]

Thinking is not doing. It is either pre-contemplation or contemplation.