That is a horrible nightmare. When my nightmares were at their worst when I was a teenager I found an article that said we could direct our dreams. It is easier with recurring dreams and nightmares like mine were. There was a point in the dream that I always remembered and I used it. For me it was hearing myself say "where am I?" Before I went to sleep I used that point and imagined a new outcome past it. It didn't work the first time, but it took only a couple weeks and I was able to do it. It mentioned that in the article and is why I didn't give up on it. I began to recognize that point and that it was the nightmare and my mind rewired itself. The nightmare just became a dream that I could direct. Even now, 30 years later, I can still recognize it and it no longer has the hold it once had.
It may be that I was just avoiding the emotions that it was bringing up but at the time I didn't know what else to do. I could not remember the event that caused it. That memory came back only a year ago and I am working on that "stuff " now. It hasn't been easy but I see a lot of improvement, enough for me to hope that it gets better.
I hope find an answer to what helps you.
