Something new - I started a subscription with smart monitor

Flying Dove

I started a subscription with smart monitor- inspyre app on my smart watch. It is connected to husband's phone. He and I will be notified of any abnormal movements. Seizures. None so far. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling fear. There was no threat etc. Possibly the harm of doomsday thinking ideology etc is not gone. I will have to keep working on me.
I can clarify more today. I feel as though I missed some horrible bullet coming at me. I possibly had an aura- orange light from my left eye. An aura if it was this is a warning a seizure might occur. I am out of the dissociation caused by me following world events and my husband's doomsday thinking. I got way overstretched by multiple issues. Also yesterday I learned that the county my husband and live in has the highest rate of suicides for our state and the US. The only behavioral health services here are the DWI program and the crisis line. The therapy I resumed is telehealth covered by my insurance.
One thing to keep in mind, as far as suicide rates, is that those are REPORTED statistics. A great many countries (Middle East and Asia, in particular) report ZERO suicides, per year. Similar reporting slants exist in the US. In small towns? Very nearly zero (as suicide negates life insurance, and most small town people want the loved ones to get life insurance benefits) meanwhile large cities? Rubber stamp suicides left/right/center, as they save on investigation times & paperwork & blah blah blah. So, basically? People are people, the world over. Shrug.

Which doesn’t mean that your climate & general resources suck so badly that people off themselves rather than find better. Your state/region durn well be the most miserable, and unimaginative, nationwide. But? YOU are not. No matter how badly you are hurting. YOU have mad skills, and resources, and imagination. Full stop.
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