Stress and triggers in the social service field

[ImSad]

I’ve been working a new job for around 3 months. The burnout is starting to sink in already. I work with kids in the foster care system. There are a lot of times that I love my job, but there have also been many triggering moments that I have to mask when I’m around the kids.

Lately I don’t know how to keep my work stress at work. I don’t know how to practice self care. Because I work until midnight, all I really do is sleep and go to work. I used to have a lot of stress dreams about work when I first started. Since then I’ve started smoking more weed after a little break and it makes it so I rarely remember my dreams.

I guess I’m just not sure how to navigate a job that’s unpredictable, stressful, and sometimes triggering. I need to find a better balance, because I love what I do, I just need to find a better way to take care of myself so that I’m not back to barely treading water in terms of my mental health.

Does anyone have any experience or advice on this issue?

 

[EveHarrington]

To me the biggest issue is that you don’t have time for self care. I think that if you can’t make/find time for self care, then burnout and symptom spiraling will be inevitable. I know we all grew up being told we can do anything we put our minds to, but that’s not really true for anyone, and especially not true for those of us with ptsd who require extra time (daily) to engage in self care.

 

[ImSad]

To me the biggest issue is that you don’t have time for self care. I think that if you can’t make/find time for self care, then burnout and symptom spiraling will be inevitable. I know we all grew up being told we can do anything we put our minds to, but that’s not really true for anyone, and especially not true for those of us with ptsd who require extra time (daily) to engage in self care.

Do you have any tips for self care? This job is just incredibly stressful, and because of the schedule it’s difficult for me to get into a routine of getting up early enough to actually do self care instead of just sleeping and laying in bed until it’s time to get ready for work. I think I just don’t have a lot of experience with self care things in general, so it’s hard to incorporate that when I don’t really have the tools. Any suggestions would be welcome and appreciated.

 

[Harmonics]

I guess I’m just not sure how to navigate a job that’s unpredictable, stressful, and sometimes triggering. I need to find a better balance, because I love what I do, I just need to find a better way to take care of myself so that I’m not back to barely treading water in terms of my mental health.

Does anyone have any experience or advice on this issue?

For a little background, I have a BSW and am currently working on my MSW. We know from research that social workers in their first 5 years of practice are at the highest risk for burn-out. If you are not already in therapy, find a therapist as soon as possible. Our professors told us in undergrad that we basically would need to be in therapy throughout our careers if we wanted to make it in the field without succumbing to burn-out and compassion fatigue. When you add a trauma history, it makes it even more important.

I have found that keeping a list of self-care options is very useful. I even take the list with me when I travel. It is in large print, so when I am overwhelmed, it is still easy to read. It includes things like playing the piano, coloring, knitting, petting cats, taking a bath, reading for fun (a big deal when you are a student), taking a walk, doing a body scan, meditation, gardening, journaling, drinking a cup of tea, and so on. When I am having a rough time, I just work my way down the list. One particular activity will usually resonate, and it seems to change often.

And yes, I get that you love this job. I love mine too! In order to continue to provide good services, however, I am gradually learning to get better at taking care of myself. After all, if I don't take care of myself, I will have nothing left to give others.

 

[ImSad]

@Harmonics thanks for all the helpful feedback. And yes, I do have a therapist, so I need to work with her more on these issues.

I have my bachelors in psych & plan on picking up my MSW program in a year or so. There was always a huge emphasis on self care and having a therapist of your own. I think my main problem may be that I just don’t have good self care things for myself. Or maybe I do, it’s just difficult for me to identify and utilize them. Going to have to make that a priority in therapy for the time being.

 

[EveHarrington]

Do you have any tips for self care?

For me, my self care looks like this...

Showering regularly ie every 2-3 days (I say this as I have sensitive skin so showering daily is out.)

Doing my hair, skincare routine, makeup, etc. When I look good, I feel good/better.

Taking my medication daily and on time. Working with my doctor on med changes and giving new meds/doses a chance to work.

Eating regularly. I’m not a 3 meals a day kind of person, so 2 meals is usually sufficient. I also try to not overeat. All of this is dependent on my nausea levels.

Take my supplements daily especially now that I’m not eating enough.

Keeping my bedroom, living areas neat. Well, neat enough, lol. Too much clutter is stressful to me. I’m adopting some of the ways of Marie Kondo, but not all as I would feel to sterilized.

Doing my daily muscle rolling/stretching, getting enough exercise.

Me time. Every. Single. Day. Without fail. I can’t go a day without it. I need at least a few hours by myself, just doing whatever.

Listening to my body/mind and letting it guide me as to what I need. I have sensory issues too so this is especially important (in pretty much everything I do).

Gettting enough sleep. This is huge! One of my therapists told me that this always needs to be a priority as if my sleep isn’t good, everything else is going to be worse.

Engaging in my hobbies/interests on a regular basis.

Checking in with myself to see what my body/mind need. I do IFST/parts work so it’s a matter of checking in with my inner child and various emotions/thoughts to see what they need.

Your list may/will look different, based on what you need to feel good every day.

I’d start by making a list of the things that you need to feel good every day.

I think that if you stick to your list, you’ll find that your job won’t burn you out so much.

:hug:

 

[ImSad]

For me, my self care looks like this...

Showering regularly ie every 2-3 days (I say this as I have sensitive skin so showering daily is out.)

Doing my hair, skincare routine, makeup, etc. When I look good, I feel good/better.

Taking my medication daily and on time. Working with my doctor on med changes and giving new meds/doses a chance to work.

Eating regularly. I’m not a 3 meals a day kind of person, so 2 meals is usually sufficient. I also try to not overeat. All of this is dependent on my nausea levels.

Take my supplements daily especially now that I’m not eating enough.

Keeping my bedroom, living areas neat. Well, neat enough, lol. Too much clutter is stressful to me. I’m adopting some of the ways of Marie Kondo, but not all as I would feel to sterilized.

Doing my daily muscle rolling/stretching, getting enough exercise.

Me time. Every. Single. Day. Without fail. I can’t go a day without it. I need at least a few hours by myself, just doing whatever.

Listening to my body/mind and letting it guide me as to what I need. I have sensory issues too so this is especially important (in pretty much everything I do).

Gettting enough sleep. This is huge! One of my therapists told me that this always needs to be a priority as if my sleep isn’t good, everything else is going to be worse.

Engaging in my hobbies/interests on a regular basis.

Checking in with myself to see what my body/mind need. I do IFST/parts work so it’s a matter of checking in with my inner child and various emotions/thoughts to see what they need.

Your list may/will look different, based on what you need to feel good every day.

I’d start by making a list of the things that you need to feel good every day.

I think that if you stick to your list, you’ll find that your job won’t burn you out so much.

:hug:

Much of the things on your list are very accurate to me. It’s just the utilizing it part that I struggle with.

I’m just coming out of a few eeek long stretch of not taking my meds consistently. I also let my skin care routine go for a week or 2, so my face felt and looked gross. But I’ve been on top of those lately so its definitely helped.

I really need to work on the whole cleaning/tidying up thing. And alone time. Right now I have both of my days off with my partner. It’s too much, and I sort of feel bad saying that. But I’m trying to change my work schedule so we’ll only have one day off together. I work second shift so a lot of my time before work is just spent sleeping in and procrastinating getting ready. I need just one full day to myself so I can be better about practicing my hobbies and just focusing on myself and my needs.

So, I guess you’ve helped me identify a lot of the things I need to use as self care! All things I didn’t even realize for some reason. It’s the utilization part I struggle with, but that will be a topic to focus on with T.