Sufferer Suffering Too

[Footie freak]

Hi, I am new to this forum.

I am suffering with PTSD, diagnosed in 2005. Since then, I have been a total wreck, with lots of time off work through exhaustion and depression. I had counselling initially followed by CBT but I did not seem to make much headway, which just got me down even more. I finally plucked up the courage to see my GP who put me on antidepressants ( I was reluctant to take them) and referred me to an EMDR counsellor.

I don't know how I am supposed to feel, sometimes I don't feel anything, I can't concentrate on the movements and almost "switch off".

I am also not able to release any emotions, my eyes will start to water, but somehow I stop myself from releasing any tears.... Is this normal??? On my last session, I felt physically sick. Is this normal??

Any help or advice would be much appreciated.

 

[safenow]

Hi Footie freak,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum. When do you start your EMDR?

I never had that type of treatment myself, but I've heard others here say they got a lot out of it. I was diagnosed back many years ago.

I know you are going to find lots of support here. Some really great people and good information. Take your time, and look around. You ask if what you are experiencing is normal. Yes. Very normal for some of us with PTSD. Once you find the right type of therapy, it can get better.

Nice to meet you, and I"ll probably see you around the forum.

 

[Footie freak]

Blimey, I did not expect to be chatting like this with fellow sufferers, but I have to say I feel better already, knowing that I can talk to others, who are unfortunately suffering with me.

I kinda started EMDR about 5 months ago, but only drips and drabs as the counsellor did not know enough of my trauma, so it's taken me this long to open up and tell her the gruesome details. My last 3 sessions with her have been totally EMDR based, and its hard.... Physically and mentally.

Nice to meet you to, looking forward to plenty of chatting. Thank you.:)
,

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Welcome to the forum. :)

 

[Footie freak]

Thank you

 

[intothelight]

Hi Footie Freak,

Welcome to the PTSD Forum! :)

There are several threads about EMDR on this site. As you read you will notice that different people have various responses and the amount of time it takes also varies. There really isn't a "normal" with therapy and recovery as it is dependent upon the individual and their traumas.

I hope you find both the information and support here helpful as you work on healing.

Take care.

Debbie

 

[KP the nut]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

 

[zaniara]

Welcome to the forum! :)

but somehow I stop myself from releasing any tears.... Is this normal??? On my last session, I felt physically sick. Is this normal??

- Yes, recognize that.. - I can react in very strange ways, but I too have that problem with the crying not getting all the way "out", sort of.. But I have overall some difficulties getting in touch with my feelings.. A part of having PTSD I guess? And YES; EMDR is HARD!! (I'm struggling to manage coping with doing it.. Last time I just wanted to run away, and was one split second from doing so.) But it seems powerful too.. (Otherwise we wouldn't react so strongly, I guess.) I hope you feel safe with your therapist, and that you give your self time to heal in your own pace.

 

[Footie freak]

Zaniara, I seriously relate to not being able to get in touch with my feelings....but I don't know why, is it because I am scared, embarrassed or just trying to be "brave" and not show that I am fragile? I guess time will tell.