General Taking Care Of Me

[Ladyhope Somerset]

Nice one Amethist.:) I could just go one of those ice creams with the flake in it. mmmmmmm :D

 

[ISupportHer]

I do better at doing what I want to do. Example: Grandson here yesterday and I wanted to take him to a park that has a nature trail and a Nature Center. Wife didn't want to go so instead of changing our plans I took the grandson myself.

There have been plenty of times I would have just stayed home and sat around.
ISH

 

[amethist]

Not posted in here for a while, so maybe time for an up date.

My room is now sorted and ready for use. Everything is set out, but for some reason it does not feel right, something is not quite as it it should be.

So I am going to do some real deep cleansing on it. Open the windows, doors, drawers, cupboards everything that could hold any kind of negativity, to blow some fresh air through everywhere.Then burn some sage, followed by sweet grass. I am going to and talk to the lovely people at the gems shop, maybe they can suggest something extra I need to do or put in it. I may even need to grid it with some clear quartz or some other crystals to get the energy back to how it was before. I may even have to move it round again and position everything in different places.

Hubby has had a bad few weeks, which we are putting down to his med tweak. He has been angry, which he never was before, but now understands this maybe because he was so mushy brained because of the meds, that it was kept stuffed down. After reading a post with the different stages of grief, which made so much sense, then reading and explaining it to hubby, it seems the anger stage was never faced and worked through.

At the weekend I was supposed to go out for the day with my youngest daughter, but changed plans as hubby wanted to go look for a dog, but at the last minute, changed his mind, and went to the pub, which was the wrong thing to do. But not going over all that again. This wound me up big style, even though I understood his reasoning, but made worse because I had explained we would not be able to bring one home that day for a various reasons, and had tried to change his mind about going.

Yesterday, even though I was feeling crap after Saturdays episode and the rebound effects on Sunday and Monday, I did go out with my youngest daughter, her partner and my grandchildren. We had a wonderful day out, though not to the coast as we had originally planned, the weather put a stop to that idea.

We called into our house on our way back, so the kids could see granddad for a short while, before we took them home. I had everything crossed hoping he would be as I left him that morning. He was so pleased to see them, and he was as I had left him, though looking tired and a bit drained.

I feel tired this morning, not surprising after the last few weeks and days.

Hopefully now we can both move on from this, and maybe I should also look deeper into my own issues a bit more, work through those bits that should have been worked through a long time ago. Maybe time to meditate more often and do some Chakra balancing, or better still phone a friend and go see her to have do it for me professionally.

 

[amethist]

I have just spent the last hour with all windows, drawers, cupboards and doors open. Letting the breeze blow through everything, then smudged it all with a White Sage and Cedar bundle, followed with sweet grass.

Hubby has now gone to bed for an hour, looking exhausted, but he said, feeling he can sleep more relaxed now. Even though he does not really believe anything like this works, he did push me to get it done this morning.

We sat outside while we let the breeze blow through, talking about what we could so easily have lost this weekend. Thanking what ever powers were listening, for the strong foundation we already had before PTSD invaded our live.

Now it is my turn to do what ever I need to do for myself. Maybe now is the time to take a walk by the river and scream for a while.

 

[ISupportHer]

Now it is my turn to do what ever I need to do for myself. Maybe now is the time to take a walk by the river and scream for a while.

This is a start! I will admit to just letting a good cry break out when things were at their worst the last 5 years. Or maybe as one you your craft projects you can sew a PTSD pillow of some sort, then beat the crap out of it when you need to. It will help focus the anger on the PTSD when you are tempted to place blame on a person.

OK, everybody stop right there, I think I will contact the patent office!! Hmmm, how many members here? $20 a pillow, and everyone will want one. I may be rich!

ISH

 

[amethist]

Ha screaming did not help. :rolleyes:

I am going to the carers support group tonight.

I have abandoned hubby's mother, she wants to be selfish and not get the help his dad has a right to, she can do it on her own. She has 2 daughters of her own who should be the ones to deal with all this crap not me.

I am getting stuck into decorating with what bits of paint I have.

I am doing my own thing more each day, leaving hubby to either join in and help or sit and vegetate on his own.

I will have some art work done for Christmas, may even send out the first batch as Christmas presents.

In other words my new motto is "I will do this, I can do this and I am going to do this". What ever it is.

Amethist

 

[amethist]

Last night I had my husband in stitches with a reply after he had been ribbing me about being able to fix things. From door bells, which I had just done, to motorbikes.

He asked my how come I was small and petite, but could wield a spanner or a screw driver and fix things so well, and look good in a pair of greasy jeans with oil on them like a bloke.

I just looked at him with a glint in my eye and said, "Its my alter ego darling"

He nearly fell off his chair laughing, and agreed that it had to be, as I do so many delicate things, but can do the man stuff too.

With or without a manual. :D

 

[amethist]

Next step in taking care of me is...

I now have a volunteer job at my local Carer's office. 2 hour, 2 afternoons a week looking after the reception.

This includes answering the phone, taking messages, greeting other people who come into the office, possibly feeling like I did, not so long ago.

My time to give back for how they have helped me over the last few years.

 

[amethist]

I feel like I am stood in front of a brick wall today with now way over, round or under it.

Hubby has reduced his medication, and I had told him it would take a few days for him to notice the difference, but all he has done today, again, is sleep.

We do think it is the medication that is not helping this, plus the the thought of driving to Manchester next week, which he is looking forward to, is causing some anxiety. But it is annoying that all he is doing is sleeping again.

Or maybe I am just expecting too much too soon.

 

[amethist]

I have had to take a lot more care of myself over the last few months, because of what is suggested is frozen shoulders, but could be something else.

It is suspected that it may be Polymyalgia, as the developing symptoms suggest, which will need steroid tablets to deal with it. It will be a few more weeks before I know for certain, after the results for the latest blood test come back.

This is something else which runs in the family and has to be watched for.

Hubby is doing OK at helping me out with the things I am struggling with. Unfortunately he cant help me get comfy to sleep, which is one of the things that is doing my head in most with it, that and the sharp pains when I forget what I am doing.

 

[Nicolette]

sharp pains when I forget what I am doing.

I'm sorry you are suffering Amethist. Hope the doctors can sort it out for you and give you relief. :hug:

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I am sorry Amethist. :( I hope you feel better soon and please take it easy on yourself.