Dissociation and taking care of yourself

[Mrs Challenged]

Hello,
Im hoping someone on here might understand me, or maybe there are others that have similar situations.
It’s taken years of dissociation (a deeply ingrained coping strategy) but the other day for some reason I realised what I was doing. I had 30 mins to sit and read a book - one of my ‘self care’ activities I try and turn to.
Instead of reading my book I sprinted around the house in a dissociation state filling that 30 mins with all the things that I considered needed immediate attention (they didn’t really need to be done just then).
I stayed in the dissociative state, my self care was immediately given up and once again everyone else in my home was taken care of except me.
For a couple of days this week I’ve tried to schedule self care time but it’s not worked.
How do others manage situations like this?

 

[Friday]

IME/IMO

For natural caretakers, taking care of others is PART of self care.

If you’re a natural caretaker? You’ll need to double book your time. Unless you owe no one your care/interest/involvement. Which is rare for that personality, but does happen. In which case? Book TRIPLE time, instead of double. As seeking out others to give a f*ck about should also be included in baseline self-care.

Others? Do not have to be people. Feeding the crows. Or hummingbirds. Regardless of the others in your life? Real people with deep and important relationships to you; real people, strangers in your care; pets; wild animals? If part of YOU is taking care of others? Taking care of others IS PART of self care. But only part. Like an artist paints, a writer writes, a carer contributes. It’s PART of you. But not all of you. Not by a long shot. Not even if you’re Da Vinci or Florence Nightengale. What one gives to others is a PART, but only a part. Feed the whole, by including the parts. Rather than refusing them.

 

[deno]

That scenario you described—having time to yourself but using it to run around instead—is something I get. When you’ve spent years running on autopilot, slowing down feels wrong, even when it’s exactly what you need.

So how do you stop? Catch yourself in the moment. Ask, is this actually urgent, or am I just avoiding taking care of myself? That small pause can make a huge difference.

And maybe self-care doesn’t have to mean sitting still. Maybe it’s a walk, stretching, music—whatever helps you feel more like you. The fact that you noticed this pattern is already progress.

 

[BryceVasquez]

Hello,
Im hoping someone on here might understand me, or maybe there are others that have similar situations.
It’s taken years of dissociation (a deeply ingrained coping strategy) but the other day for some reason I realised what I was doing. I had 30 mins to sit and read a book - one of my ‘self care’ activities I try and turn to.
Instead of reading my book I sprinted around the house in a dissociation state filling that 30 mins with all the things that I considered needed immediate attention (they didn’t really need to be done just then).
I stayed in the dissociative state, my self care was immediately given up and once again everyone else in my home was taken care of except me.
For a couple of days this week I’ve tried to schedule self care time but it’s not worked.
How do others manage situations like this?


You're not alone in this, I completely understand. It’s tough to break that cycle, especially when putting others first feels automatic. Maybe try setting a small, non-negotiable self-care ritual, like even five minutes of deep breathing or reading just one page. Progress, not perfection. You deserve that time too! How do you feel about micro self-care moments? My college junior needed urgent help with his law assignment, and I recommended Academized, a reliable paper writing service, which is available Write My Essay For Me: Expert Paper Writing Service | Academized.com here. He placed an order, and within days, he received a detailed and well-structured paper that covered every aspect of his topic. His professor was pleased with the quality, and he received great marks. If you’re in need of academic writing support, this service is worth trying!

How are you now?

 

[thursday]

In my understanding what you were doing was, avoiding to come in contact with yourself. The danger zone. So you had to get away from your inner self, by doing all sorts of things that weren't needed just then. Try a sorter period, like a minute reading or 5 minutes and extent later. Maybe that works?
My personal definition of dissociation is becoming a different person/s and putting myself way in the background.

 

[arfie]

a recurring theme in my own recovery is where what i thought i needed turned out to be not quite what i needed. continual fine-tuning needed, especially in the area of self-care. when that happens, i usually hit a manic episode where i run around like a fool, doing everything but what i **ought** to be doing. when this occurs, i ply acceptance and observation. in the acceptance step, i strive for non-judgemental detachment so that i can simply observe what is happening. when i can find a pattern to the behavior, i have discovered a previously unrecognized self-care need. when i can find none, i forgive myself for falling off the proverbial wagon for a spell. setbacks happen.

for what it's worth
in my own psychotherapy sessions, we call what you describe, "a manic episode." dissociation is where i distance myself so far from the physical world that i appear catatonic to casual observers. i am verily incapable of physical activity.